Only Yours
by Maknesium
Summary: A collection of one shots revolving around Female Hawke and Fenris. So much of their relationship was left up in the air. This is just of few of my ideas on things that could have transpired between them. Expect fluff, mosty smut, and silliness.
1. Jump

**A/N: Ever since Dragon Age II came out I have had tons of ideas whirling around in my head for these two, but I've only just now gotten enough courage to actually post anything I have written. I have a few more ideas floating in my head, so I will be updating hopefully soon. This story is post the "this is too much," speech. Might be a little silly in some parts, but just one of my takes on what Fenris and Hawke's relationship could be like. Thank you KRISTEN for being such an amazing friend and giving me the courage to post this. I love you. KIM!**

**Summary: Hawke and her friends enjoy an outing. We learn that Hawke has a silly little fear and Fenris helps her conquer it. **

Hawke had been able to convince Knight-Captain Cullen to release Bethany from the gallows for a few days for good behavior. Fenris didn't even want to know what she did to persuade him.

In celebration all of Hawke's companions ventured towards Sundermount for a 'camping trip' as she called it. Apparently it was a tradition within the Hawke family, though Fenris was finding it difficult to see the appeal. Trudging through dirt to sleep on the ground? He'd done that countless times before, but never willingly. But since their one and only night together, he took every opportunity she gave him to spend time with her. He was ashamed, embarrassed even that he couldn't bring himself to have something more than a night of passion with a woman he might love, but he just wasn't ready. And for her part, she seemed to understand. At first she had been more careful with her flirtation, and more mindful of showing him intimacy, but that was to be expected. Gradually, however, it became clear that there was still something between them that neither one were willing to completely give up on. The timing just wasn't there. Fenris had too many inner demons to deal with, and Hawke was handling the loss of her mother and newly being deemed Champion. They now shared a silent promise of devotion to one another. Holding hands here, a kiss on the cheek there, and a few prolonged hugs in between so far had been enough to sustain their desire for one another. Perhaps one day it might not, but for now it was enough. They had too much on their plates to have to worry about the pressures of a new romance. He had to be careful though, a repeat of him walking out on her might not go over so well a second time. But they were still an item whether they were going to admit it or not. He was only hers. She was only his.

Due to this being a leisurely outing, Hawke and Fenris trailed behind the others with her Mabari. Merrill, swearing that she knew the perfect spot to camp, led the way with the rest of the women. Leaving Varric, Anders, and Sebastian to float in between the two groups.

Fenris was relishing in the solitude they were allowed by trailing behind. Although they were hardly speaking, just being able to reach out and brush her hand or the small of her back without the other's prodding eyes was something to be appreciated. Too many times had he been cornered and questioned about their relationship. He always gave the same answer, "You are imagining things. Hawke and I are only friends." Perhaps he stretched the truth slightly. They were definitely more than friends, but what exactly he wasn't sure. Whatever they were had been working out well for the both of them. He didn't wish to ruin a good thing by being forced to label it. He believed Hawke felt much the same way. Many times he had heard her tell the others to sod off when they pestered her for the same answers.

As they walked Fenris glanced over in her direction. The wind had picked up and the cool breeze was blowing through her hair. She tucked some loose strands behind her ear and bent down to pet her Mabari, smiling brightly as the dog wiggled and danced with delight. These were his favorite moments with her. The ones when she wasn't even aware he was watching. It was in times such as this that he thanked the Maker for blessing him with such a beautiful, understanding, one of a kind woman. She had crept into his life, tearing down the walls of hate and mistrust he had built. He was certain no other person in Thedas would have been able to accomplish such a goal. She was patient with him, never pushed. Soft when he needed it, but knew when to be hard with him as well. In his admiration of her a deep contented sigh pushed out of his lungs, causing her to look up at him. Her smiled widened as she straightened back up and walked towards him.

"Thinking of anything interesting," she asked tilting her head at him and clasped her hands behind her back.

"Your hair is getting longer," he grinned and reached to pull some stray strands through his fingers.

The smirk on her face told him that she knew his thoughts had gone a little deeper than that. "I was thinking about cutting it," she responded choosing not to push him on it. She moved her hand to hold the hair he was twirling in his fingers, lightly brushing his skin as she did so, purposefully no doubt.

No one could be more perfect to him than she was. He wet his lips and thought about kissing her, but knew better than to do that so openly. If they had been in private he might have been bold enough, but they had learned that in the company of others talk and whispers would inevitably ensue, and they would be forced to address their odd relationship. Reluctantly he pulled away from her and started walking again, without hesitation she fell in right beside him.

Hawke smiled to herself. The two of them had not really said anything important to one another, but he was still able to give her butterflies. What a blessing he had been. Exactly what she had needed, when she needed it.

Their night of intimacy had terrified her nearly as much as it had him. She'd known she wasn't ready for a relationship, having to answer to someone. But in the heat of the moment all her pent up desires had swelled and she momentarily threw her inhibition to the wind. At first she had been a little insulted when he left so quickly, but after she had time to think about the repercussions of what could have happened if he stayed she was grateful. Right now she would make a terrible partner. There were too many things she was still working out for herself to add another person to the mix. Though at first there had been some awkwardness, she was so unsure how to act around him. But after one night of wine and some playful banter the uncomfortable feelings melted away. Now there was a silent understanding between them. She knew he wasn't ready to make any sort of commitment, and though she never mentioned it to him neither was she. He was there when she needed him, but knew when to give her space and wasn't constantly asking her about her feelings or what she was thinking. Half the time she didn't know herself. But there was one thing she did know, no other man could claim her heart the way he had. Most women might find his apprehension intimidating, but she wouldn't have it any other way. The Maker had sent her a man who gave her exactly what she needed. He was a gift, and one day when they were both ready it would be amazing. Her heart swelled with the knowledge that she actually had something to look forward to and on impulse she reached out for his hand. He interlaced their fingers and rubbed his thumb along her skin before bringing it to his lips kissing it gently and then releasing it. She sighed in satisfaction. He was perfect for her. It was just right amount of affection she needed to know that he cared, but not too much to make her uneasy. The two of them looked towards one another, grinning widely. Both elated about their unspoken bond.

"Oh look how cute," Merrill spoke from a few yards ahead of them, quietly enough that they wouldn't hear. "Now they both have puppy eyes."

"What was that?" Bethany asked looking back to the two of them in confusion.

"Nothing," Aveline countered quickly and pushed her forward so she couldn't gawk. She for one knew that importance of privacy, especially for people such as the two of them. Both so reluctant to speak about their feelings. Hawke seemed happy with the way things were going and she intended to keep it that way. "Merrill are we getting closer to this 'spot' of yours. I grow tired of walking," she changed the subject.

It seemed to work for the dalish looked around at her surroundings apparently forgetting about them. "Yes, I believe so. If I'm not mistaken it's just over the hillside."

"Good, I'm starting to sweat _everywhere,_" Isabela chimed in rolling her shoulders. "And it's not the good kind."

"There is a good kind of sweat," Merrill asked innocently.

"Oh yes," she answered. "A really good kind."

Merrill tilted her head in confusion, clearly not understanding what the pirate was getting at but the let the topic go.

"I for one am ready to relax a little," Bethany spoke up. "Being cooped in the gallows is terribly dreadful." Her mind began to wander back to all the nights she had cried herself to sleep, missing her family. Luckily her depressing train of thought was interrupted by the Mabari barking and yipping. She turned around to see him running excitedly towards them before cutting into the bushes.

"Oh Maker," Hawke sighed running to catch up with him. "What's he found now?" She whistled out her special call for him. When he didn't hurry back to her, she did it again a little louder. A loud rustle of the foliage signified that he was returning. Hawke knelt down to receive him as he came bursting out of the bushes. "What have you got there boy," she asked pulling the branch from his mouth. "Oh that's a fine stick," she smiled whirling it around in her hand. The mabari crouched down on his haunches wiggling his nub of a tail back and forth. Hawke laughed and chucked the wood through the air. The dog raced in the direction of the flying object, jumping and catching it before it touched the ground then hurried back to her. "Now I've done it," she chuckled. "You'll have me doing this for hours," she smiled at him. He dropped the stick from his mouth and whined back at her, sitting down a little impatiently waiting for her to throw it again. Her head dropped in defeat. "You know I can't say 'no' to that face." The Mabari barked happily and pounced towards her showering her face with kisses. Hawke laughed and moved her head trying to keep his tongue from touching her mouth.

"Sister," Bethany crossed her arms at her chest and smiled. "This is exactly why you can't get a suitable noble to court you."

"What in all of Thedas makes you think that I give two shits about the nobles of Hightown," Hawke asked still laughing as she patted her Mabari's head, finally able to stand to her feet now that his affection had worn off.

"Besides," Isabela cut in. "Those nobles like Hawke just fine. The other night I was at the Blooming Rose, some young man named Hamlin just kept going on and on about how wonderful you were." She clasped her hands under her chin looking off in the distance as if daydreaming. "How your eyes sparkled like diamonds. How your skin is as soft as silk."

"I don't see how he would know how soft my skin is," Hawke frowned. "In fact," she propped her hands at her waist and jutted her hip out. "I don't think I've ever even spoken to him." She narrowed her eyes and looked down to her Mabari. "We're going to have to pay this Hamlin a visit." He growled menacingly then grabbed a pine cone in his mouth and began shaking it back and forth trying to shred it to bits. "You read my mind," Hawke smiled and then bent down to be at eye level with him again. "Why don't you tell Bethany what we think of the _nobles _of Kirkwall." Her mabari walked a little towards her sister and began making gagging noises, heaving his back up and down. "That's right," Hawke chuckled. "Uck," she covered her mouth with her hand and began mimicking throwing up.

Bethany rolled her eyes. "You can't be alone forever sister. Sooner or later you have to settle down and make babies."

Hawke laughed in disbelief. "Don't hold your breath. And who said I was alone?" Her eyebrow arched up as she counted out on her fingers. "I have Bodahn, and Sandal, and now Orana." Her dog whined. "Well of course you, boy. That goes without saying," she shot him a wink.

"You're hopeless," Bethany sighed and turned around beginning to walk again.

Fenris couldn't help but smile at Hawke as she looked over to him. Although the idea of her rushing off to get married and make babies was dreadfully unappealing, knowing that she had no desire to do so sated his jealousy. She strolled behind him to take up walking on the opposite side. Her fingers wrapped around his forearm as she caught up, but she quickly withdrew them. Fenris didn't mind her touching but was glad she was just as reserved as he was.

Sebastian stopped walking and waited for them to catch up with him. "Would it not be wise to settle down with a noble someday, Hawke," he asked.

"Maybe one day I will settle down, but I don't see how whether or not it is with a noble makes much of a difference. A man is a man. His ranking in society does little to peak my interest," she answered honestly.

"Oh. I see. It is not that you are put off by nobles. You just will not limit yourself to them," he looked to her for clarification.

"I suppose you could say that. But can we please talk about something else? I will never understand why everyone is so enthralled with the idea of me settling down. Why should I be looking for a man to take care of me? I've done just fine without one for quite some time. _If _I ever choose to settle down it will be at a time and with a person of my choosing." Hawke suddenly stopped her rant and looked at the two men beside her. Sebastian's lip was quirked up in confusion and Fenris was smirking to himself. "Sorry. I tend to get a little riled up about that topic. Mother was quite persistent."

"Forgive me for bringing it up," Sebastian bowed and sped up his pace to catch up with Varric and Anders.

Hawke chuckled at his retreating back and looked over to Fenris to see him laughing as well.

"I rather like seeing you get flustered," he smiled. "You look…" he paused searching for the right word, "cute."

"I look _cute_?" She stopped and crossed her arms.

"Yes you look cute," he laughed. Clearly she was not accustomed to be called that. "Now will you come on and stop your pouting. We're falling behind from the rest of the group."

She relented her posture and started walking again. "If I am cute, then _you_ are adorable," she looked at him as if she'd won some extensive debate.

"Fine, I will allow it. But only you are given permission to use that word in reference to me and never in the company of others," he replied coolly.

The smile shining on her face made his heart swell knowing that it was for him. Since the others were so far ahead of them, Fenris placed his hand around her waist, resting it at her hip as he gently guided her up the hill. He never thought he would ever enjoy physical contact, but with Hawke his mind was constantly thinking up new ways to 'accidently' touch her when others were around. This was very unexpected, but very needed. He found himself thinking again how lucky he was to have someone so perfect for him in his life. The fact that she allowed him to be a part of hers at all was still too much for Fenris to comprehend.

As they reached the top of the hill Merrill came running back to them, "You have to see this. Oh, it's more beautiful than I remembered. Hawke you will love it!" She grabbed her by the wrist and dragged her up to their camping spot. Which didn't look that spectacular to her. Some nice room to put in tents, some pretty trees providing shade, but Hawke could have found something like this a few miles back. "Ummm…It's great Merrill."

"Oh no, this is what is wonderful," she giggled and led her to an opening in the tree line next to their camp. A waterfall that must have been fifty feet or higher rolled down the mountain, emptying into a large pool surrounded by a large rock bed. Hawke stepped forward mouth slightly opened and saw that the river continued on down the mountain past their campsite. Trees blocked out most of the sun and there was a small opening in the rocks that allowed for easier access to the water.

"Merrill this _is _wonderful." She turned and gave a heartfelt smile to her.

Everyone was eager to get in the water after their long hike up the mountain. So Hawke and Aveline agreed to stay behind and set up camp. Fenris felt uncomfortable leaving her to handle all the work but she insisted, so he and the others changed into their swimwear.

* * *

><p>"Umm, Anders what are those?" Isabela cackled as the mage exited the woods.<p>

"Look, it's hot enough under all those robes. Sometimes it's nice to breathe," he inhaled deeply and let his hands run down his mostly exposed body. The swimwear he had chosen could barely be called such.

"Those are briefs," Bethany laughed. "Maker Anders, they barely cover up anything at all!"

"I don't see you complaining about Isabela," he scowled and pointed towards the pirate who was as expected scantily clad in a barely there two piece.

"Hey when you've got it," she winked over at him swaying her hips as she walked towards the water.

Everyone else had been as modest as possible, opting for shorts or tasteful one pieces. Well all except Fenris. He still wore his tight leggings, not eager to expose more of his markings than necessary.

The water felt magnificent gradually coming up to their waist the further out they ventured, and closer to the waterfall dipping down much deeper. Fenris walked to the deepest part and immersed himself in the water, letting it drench his hair and skin. When he came up for air he noticed Sebastian looking wide eyed and open mouthed back at their camp. He peered through the opening in the tree line to see Aveline waiting patiently in a pair of tight shorts and a tank top as Hawke stripped out of her armor. Her top came first and Fenris felt his pants tighten as her torso stretched and arched to remove the clothing, revealing only her breast binding underneath. A sting of jealousy hit his gut at others being allowed to see her like this and he shot Sebastian an evil glare. The prince was completely unaware of his ice filled stare and wiped his mouth before swallowing audibly. Hawke then moved down to her pants and began shimming out of them completely unaware of how incredibly sensual her movements were. She bent down in a painfully erotic way to pull her feet free of her leggings.

"Careful, now. You might burn a hole through her with the way you're staring," Varric casually commented towards Sebastian.

He shook his head at being caught and began rubbing the back of his neck as he laughed nervously. "Sorry," he chuckled. "I just have never…I mean to say that she is always…Hawke just looks so…I mean with all her armor…"

"Easy," the dwarf put his hand up. "You're starting to sound like Merrill.

"Sorry," he muttered and turned away from Hawke, but not before sneaking in one last peak over his shoulder.

Fenris however didn't stop his staring. He watched Hawke intently as she walked towards the water. She looked up from her chatter with Aveline and met his eyes, smiling as she did so. He couldn't help but grin back and he began moving to greet her.

"Sorry everyone," she addressed them as she got in the water. "I forgot proper swimming attire. I hope my small clothes aren't too revealing. But by the looks of what Isabela and Anders are wearing I think I'm fine," she grinned and stretched her arms over her head.

"Umm, it's quite fine, Hawke," Sebastian offered and awkwardly stared at her.

"Uh-huh," she cut her eyes to him. "Why don't you draw a picture? It might last a little longer," she smiled but didn't look at him.

The prince said nothing but sunk back down into the water, clearly embarrassed that Hawke called him out.

Hawke moved towards Fenris and immersed herself in the water as she placed her hands at his waist, happy that she was able to openly show him affection without prying eyes. "Looks like you forgot yours too," she smirked up at him and tugged on his waistband.

He only made a pleasured hum as he ran one hand up her thigh to the small of her back, wishing that he could pull her closer to him. Something about being in the water and the near nudeness of both their bodies made him forget about any invisible boundaries they had set up.

"How do you like camping so far," she smiled and curled her hands on his abdomen.

Fenris leaned into her face, and whispered lowly in her ear, "It is quite enjoyable."

"And we're just getting started," her breath tickled down his neck and he felt her body begin to move to close the gap between them.

As he brought his other hand under the water to guide her, Merrill yelled from up above them.

"Everyone watch this!"

All eyes moved to the top of the waterfall as Merrill raised her hands in the air and took a running start before jumping over the edge freefalling all the way down. Fenris felt Hawke's hand grip his waist and he turned to look at her. A nervous smile was spreading across her face as Merrill reappeared from under the water. She tucked her hair behind her ear needlessly and her drug her bottom lip between her teeth. "Everything alright," he asked as his thumb rubbed across her hip bone.

She smiled back up at him weakly. "It's fine. I'm fine." But it was obvious that she was shaken up about something.

"That was amazing! Did you see it," Merrill giggled as she swam back towards them. "Everyone you have to try it. There's a path on the other side of those trees that leads to the top," Merrill couldn't hide the excitement on her voice as she waved them over to follow her.

One by one everyone exited the water and began retreating to the trail. All except Varric, who said he wasn't about to fall to his death. He was having enough trouble as it was in the shallowest part of the water. Hawke stayed behind to keep him company. But it was still quite enjoyable to watch everyone else make the jump. Merrill couldn't resist doing it again and threw her arms in the air before jumping down. Bethany and Isabela jumped off together holding hands. Hawke laughed at her sister who plugged her nose with one hand as she fell. Anders had tried to be graceful, but ended up flailing his arms and legs making a smack when he hit the water. Aveline and Sebastian were cool and collected with theirs, walking to the edge and just jumping down feet first. And then came Fenris. Hawke's heart fluttered as he approached the edge of the waterfall. The sun was casting a beautiful glow across his bare chest. It was captivating to watch him. He moved with such grace and elegance. In an effortless movement, as if he had done it hundreds of times before, he dove off barely making a splash as his perfect form connected with the water.

"Show off," Varric muttered has he emerged from the water. Hawke couldn't stop the smile from forming on her face as he looked to her. Maker, he made her feel like a giggling school girl. She was all butterflies and blushes when in his presence.

"You're turn, Hawke," Anders called from the far side of the river breaking her trance. "We can keep Varric company now."

"Umm…I think I'll wait a little while before I go," she cast her eyes downward to hide any uncertainty that might be lingering there.

"Oh please, sister. You and I both know you have no intention of jumping off that waterfall," Bethany rolled her eyes.

Isabela quirked an eyebrow in her direction. "What? _You _are scared of heights. The woman who took down a Qunari Arishok and fought off a legion of darkspawn?"

"Not scared," Bethany jumped in before Hawke could answer. "She is terrified."

"Bethany!" Hawke scowled and splashed water in her direction. "I am not terrified of heights. Maker, I jump off buildings, cliffs, landings. I am definitely _not_ afraid."

"Then what is it exactly," she threw a victorious grin her way.

"I don't know really," she tried to seem collected and she leaned back in the water. "I suppose it's the idea of doing it for no purpose. When your adrenaline is pumping it's easy to push aside your fear. But when I take the time to think about the fact that there is no guarantee that I will come back up again, I just…freeze."

"See you admit it. You said 'push aside your fear.' Will you stop being such a baby?" Bethany threw her a knowing glance. "Besides I've seen you do it before."

"Ugh…whatever. That was different. Someone's life was at stake," Hawke grunted and moved to the more shallow water so she could prop herself up on her elbows.

"This sounds like a good story," Varric rubbed his hands together unable to resist hearing more.

Hawke sighed and closed her eyes determined to not let this ridiculous conversation ruin her mood.

"Well," Bethany began. "When we were kids father used to take us to a place on the outskirts of Lothering. It was a lot like this, only the waterfall wasn't nearly as high. She was too scared then to jump as well." She pointed in the direction of her sister. "Carver and I had so much fun pestering her for being such a chicken. We tried pushing her off a few times, but she'd cry and scream," Bethany made a whining noise trying to mimic her sisters. "Then she'd run to father. He wouldn't let us get near her…"

"That's enough," Hawke interjected with a sigh. "They get the idea. I've been scared of this since I was a child and I'm still a little chicken about it."

"Now, you can't leave us hanging, Hawke." Varric scolded her and turned back to her sister. "Who did she save?"

"It wasn't really a person she saved. But we were much older by then." Bethany ran her fingers through her wet hair as she tried to remember the story. "We were exploring the woods, looking for elfroot or something. On our way home we got turned around somehow and had to cross over a river. The current was much stronger than this one. A tree had fallen over it so we used it to make our way across. The mabari was trailing behind and just when we thought we'd made it, the tree collapsed carrying the dog downstream with it." Bethany gestured to her sister again. "_She_ raced down the bank of the river to try and catch him before he went over the waterfall but was too late."

Hawke felt the same terror as all those years ago building in her at reliving the memory of her faithful companion falling to his would be death. She moved through the water to the edge of the rock that the dog lay on, and pulled herself up to look into his eyes as she listened to Bethany retell the story.

"I've never seen her act so fast. Before we could stop her, she'd thrown her pack to the ground and kicked off her boots. Without hesitation she jumped over the side. Carver and I were terrified. This waterfall was huge." Bethany gestured wildly with her hands. "We couldn't see anything. She just disappeared into the mist. For hours we looked for her. Turned out she took a nasty hit to the head and was passed out a ways upstream with the Mabari curled up next to her. When we got home Mother was so angry. Told her it was foolish to risk her life for a dog."

"What nonsense," Hawke quickly replied. "He would have done the same for me. Isn't that right boy?" The dog closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers. Hawke smiled and nuzzled into him. "I would jump off a thousand waterfalls to save you," she whispered.

"So you'll jump to your death, but you won't jump off a little ole waterfall for fun," Anders asked raising the pitch of his voice with amusement.

"It's not the same thing," Hawke turned to him. "When I _have_ to do it, my body just goes with it. But when I try to force myself everything in me just tenses up. I get this sick feeling in my stomach, my palms start to sweat. I can't really explain it," she shrugged and began floating through the water.

"Well, I think it's time you face your fears," Anders began stalking towards her.

"I don't think so," she laughed nervously and started moving away from him.

"Now, Hawke, this is for your own good. You are going over that waterfall if I have to push you myself," he smiled menacingly moving faster towards her.

"I really don't want to Anders," the humor in her voice vanished and turned to genuine fear. "I mean it." But the mage continued moving towards her. Hawke looked around trying to find an escape. Out of the corner of her eye she saw his white hair and began swimming towards him. Anders reached out and grabbed her leg pulling her back. "Stop it, Anders," her voice cracked as she stretched her arms out for Fenris.

"Once you do it, you'll be thanking me," Anders laughed, still unable to see that she was genuinely scared, and began pulling her towards the outlet in the water.

Hawke twisted her body around, feeling a familiar sickness spread through her body as she got closer to the shore. Using all her strength, she brought her free leg to his chest and kicked as hard as she could. Anders lost his grip, and Hawke quickly took the opportunity to escape before he recovered. Frantically she started moving in the water towards Fenris. Before she was even halfway there she started reaching out for him.

Upon realizing that he was her destination, he moved towards her and reached out his arms. As soon as their fingers touched Fenris pulled her body through the water until she was completely wrapped around him. If not for her obvious fear, he might have thought this whole predicament amusing. But as it was, a strong need to protect her surged through him. "She doesn't want to do it, Anders. Leave her alone," he forcefully told him as he wrapped his arms around her body. Hawke buried her head in his neck and held on to him for dear life. Anders made some amused snort before retreating back to the other side of the water.

Ignoring everyone's prodding eyes and comments Fenris floated to a more isolated spot as he gently tried to sooth her. Once sure everyone had turned back to their previous conversations, Fenris rubbed up and down her back and nuzzled her neck, placing a soft kiss there. It made him swell with pride to know that a woman as powerful and strong as her still needed him to feel safe. He felt her relax a little in his arms and smile onto his shoulder.

"I must seem so silly," she half laughed with embarrassment.

Still cradling her back he leaned his head to look into her eyes. "You are many things, Hawke. But silly is not one of them," he smiled.

She pulled her arms from around his neck and let her hands rest at his shoulders. "Let's get back over there with the others. But promise me you won't let him drag me up there. I might not ever forgive you," she grinned.

"I promise," he leaned into her and brushed his lips across her cheek before leading them back to the others.

As they approached the group, Hawke playfully swung around his body, and wrapped herself around his back. Fenris gripped her legs at his torso and readjusted her higher on his waist.

"Maker, sister," Bethany sighed. "You haven't changed a bit. Except now instead of running to father, you're running to Fenris."

Hawke just giggled and pushed her face into his shoulder. She was somewhat embarrassed by her reaction to Anders pestering. It was ridiculous that a little jump from a waterfall could make her so terrified. But she couldn't really complain now. There was a perfectly good excuse for her to cling to Fenris for the rest of the day.

* * *

><p>As they day progressed all of her companions gratefully took in the peacefulness of their little vacation from Kirkwall. Everyone except Fenris, Hawke, and Varric continued to take turns jumping off the waterfall. But with the day winding down and their skin quickly turning to prunes they decided to end it and settle down for a meal cooked by Aveline. She needed the practice now that she and Donnic were getting a little more serious.<p>

As all of her companions vacated the water and made their way back to their campsite, Hawke lingered behind. She stood in the middle of the river facing the waterfall, remembering that last time she and her family visited the one from Bethany's story.

After a moment she felt his strong hands encircle her waist and his chest press up against her. She smiled and looked back towards him.

"Having second thoughts," he asked her, then nodded towards the waterfall.

"A little," she confessed. "The last time father brought me to that river in Lothering, I wanted so badly to jump like everyone else. I just couldn't do it." She wrapped her arms around his and leaned back into him. "I cried and cried when we got home. I was so ashamed. I told him that I should have done it, that I felt like a coward. He promised me that he would take me back, just the two of us. And then I could take all the time I needed to muster the courage to do it." She sighed and turned around in his arms to face him. "We never got the chance. Now I wish more than anything that I would have done it that last day."

"It's not too late, Hawke," he squeezed her and rest his head against the top of hers. "No one else is here. It's just the two of us. You could take all the time you needed." She still looked a little uneasy so he brought his hand to her cheek and smiled down at her. "You can do it. I have faith in you."

Hawke sighed but knew he was right. If she didn't do it now, she would just regret it again. "Alight," she nodded and let him lead her up the path to the top of the waterfall.

He never let go of her hand as they walked to the middle of the river. The current wasn't strong enough to knock them down if they kept their footing so he made sure to keep a firm grip on her. Once at the top he grabbed her other hand. The setting sun made her look even more beautiful than he ever thought possible. Even with her heavy breaths, and trembling hands, everything about her captivated him. He stepped closer to her and gripped her waist. "Take your time, Hawke," he tried to reassure her.

She looked over the edge and swallowed loudly. That feeling beginning to creep up again. All her nerves squiggling and squirming inside her. Her palms going clammy. "Will you do it with me," she nervously asked looking back to him.

"Of course," he responded lowly and moved her just an inch closer to the edge. She immediately tensed so he relaxed his grip.

"I think you will have to hold me," she closed her eyes and squeezed his hand.

He pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her torso, gripping her tightly to him. Hawke buried her head into his neck and wrapped her arms under his and across his back. "Don't let go of me," she whispered.

"I won't," he placed a kiss to the top of her head and moved them almost all the way to the edge. "Try not to breathe when you hit the water." She nodded in understanding against his chest. "When you feel your feet hit the bottom, push up with all your strength to carry you back up, ok?" She nodded again and dug into his flesh. "It will be fine, Hawke. I will not let you go." He paused for moment. "Are you ready?"

"Yes," her voice shook.

He held her possessively, lifting her slightly off the ground as he led them over the edge. Hawke gripped him even tighter as they fell, and he felt her push into him as they hit the water. As soon as he felt the bottom of the river he shot them back up, never once letting go of her.

Hawke gasped at they reached the air and then immediately started smiling. "I did it," she exclaimed and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Fenris, I did it!"

"You did," he couldn't help but laugh as he led them back to the shallow water.

"Oh, thank you," she smiled widely. Before he could respond she tentatively placed her lips against his. The act shocked him a little and he felt his body tense. Since their night together neither one had gotten the nerve to do this again. Although he had wanted to countless times.

Suddenly remembering herself and feeling his apprehension, Hawke pulled away and looked nervously away from him. "Sorry, I don't know what came over me." She began moving back towards the shore and then felt his hand grab her wrist. Upon turning back to him the look in his eyes was clear. He wanted this too. Slowly, he pulled her back to him and wrapped his arms around her waist, trailing light kisses across her jaw line before finding her lips with his.

The intensity of the moment swept over them as they relished in the feeling of each other's mouths once more. Fenris tugged on her leg requesting that she wrap it around him, she immediately did as instructed and followed with the other. He ran his hand up her thighs and across her backside. Leaving one to rest there and raking the other up before nestling it into her hair. Hawke cradled his face and kissed him so passionately so possessively he was sure his heart would burst. And then it all became clear, no matter what title they carried or whether they were willing to openly admit it, he was only hers and she was only his.

**Additional A/N: I know it seems silly that Hawke would be afraid of heights, but this story just wouldn't leave me alone. It almost ended in a little sexy time, but I decided against it. Fear not! The next one will most likely be packed filled with it. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I'm very new to fan fiction so this is a great learning experience for me. Any help or comments are always greatly appreciated. Hope I've done the two of them justice. **


	2. Public Affection

**A/N: So this story kind of got away with me. I wasn't planning on writing anything like this and then boom here this was. Hopefully it doesn't ramble on or anything. I also wanted to add that none of my stories posted here will be connected. There are all independent views of different things that I imagine happening in the relationship of Hawke and Fenris. **

**Synopsis: Fenris and Hawke Act III. They are just starting in their relationship and Fenris has some hesitancies. When Cullen starts showing an interest in Hawke he starts to see that his issues might be a little stupid. **

**Warning: Some pretty Explicit descriptions of sexy time in this one. **

Fenris propped himself up against the stone wall of the Gallows. This day was proving to be tiresome. Why was it necessary for him to tag along with her to pick up potions, check on Aveline, or trade in weapons? He sighed and crossed his arms as he took a brief glance in her direction. Haggling with the shop keep again? This trip may end up being much longer than he hoped. All he wanted to do was curl up in her bed with a glass of wine, a good book, and a mostly nude Hawke. The thought made his lips curl up in a mischievous grin. It had only been about a month since they rekindled that very old flame, and he was still getting used to it all. While he was comfortable being open with her in private the idea of making their relationship a public display still made him uneasy. At his urging they had agreed to keep everything under wraps for the time being. Prodding questions, unwanted stares, giggles whenever he turned his back. These were not things he looked forward to. He had nothing to be ashamed of, not in the least. He was honored in fact that perhaps the most beautiful and powerful woman in the city had chosen him, but something was holding him back. This didn't feel real. Sooner or later the rug was going to be pulled from under him.

The sound of Hawke's voice arguing with the stall owner broke his thoughts. He turned towards her and propped his arm above his head as he watched. Her body was bent over the edge of the table, forming a very accentuated view of her asset. Fenris felt himself grow weak at the thought of bending her over one of the many surfaces of his home, or hers, or anywhere for that matter. As if she sensed his naughty intentions, Hawke cut her eyes at him. Once certain that he was staring, she bit her lip in a playful smirk and pushed her backside out a little further in his direction. Fenris rubbed his jaw at the thought of the things he would do to her later. The stall owner began speaking again and brought her attention back to him. Fenris's lips quirked up as he took one more long look, then let his gaze wonder across the courtyard of the Gallows.

Nothing really out of the ordinary. A few Templars and Circle mages scattered here and there, caught up in their own conversations. A handful of tranquil idly walking around. Then his eyes fell on the Knight Captain. He seemed to be very interested in something across the courtyard from him. Fenris followed his line of sight, finding Hawke's backside now proudly displayed for all who wanted to take a look. A powerful sting of jealousy hit his gut and he turned back to Cullen, who was now straining to get a better look at her. A few other Templars had stopped to speak with him and Fenris felt the anger building as the Knight Captain bobbed and weaved his head around theirs to keep his sights on her. Hawke was completely oblivious and remained in her stance. Fenris could not let this continue. Even if their romance wasn't public knowledge, he still had limits. He walked over to her and barely grazed his fingers across her back.

The sensation shocked her at first. Though it could hardly be called a touch at all, for Fenris this was momentous. She tried to hide the joy in her face as she straightened up to look at him. "He's agreed to give me that longsword, the one I've been eyeing for Aveline, if I part with this amulet." Hawke pulled the chain through her fingertips and rubbed her thumb across the emblem.

"A fair trade," he responded quickly not even looking at it. "Can we please just be done with this place?"

A flash of hurt spread across her face then she turned her eyes down as she began toying with the necklace. "Fenris, you found this one for me."

He reached out to hold the emblem in his hands. Yes, he remembered that day, out on the Wounded Coast. But it carried no real special traits or helpful characteristics. There was nothing really unique about it at all. He had just handed it to her thinking that maybe she could at least get some coin for it.

"Do you remember?" She kept her voice low and began rubbing his wrist. "It was the same day that we…" she hesitated not sure what the appropriate word would be. "…you know…got together."

Fenris's stomach began to warm as he realized the amulet was special to her because it had been given by him. Despite his normal reluctances about public affection he didn't shy away from her caresses against his wrist, besides they were so minute most people probably wouldn't even notice. "I remember," he smiled and leaned in closer to her. "Why don't we go out to the Coast next week, just the two of us? I'm sure I can find you a better one." Hawke inhaled deeply and stepped just an inch closer to him.

"Made your decision have you?" The Shop Keep interrupted. "I haven't got all day. You're not the only one interested in this here sword, missy."

Clearly a little flustered Hawke turned away from him and pulled the amulet over her head. "Yes, it's a deal." As soon as the man was out of earshot she cut her eyes to Fenris. "You better not have said that just to get me to leave more quickly. I plan on holding you to this little camping trip."

Fenris chuckled and moved away from the stall, forgetting for the moment the reason he ventured over there in the first place.

As the two made their way towards the ferry someone called out to Hawke. Caught up in her conversation with Fenris, she didn't seem to notice. The voice echoed her name again a little louder this time. She turned around to see the Knight Captain sprinting towards her. "Hawke," he called again with his arm outstretched trying to stop her from boarding the ferry.

"Cullen," she smiled back at him. "It's good to see you."

"And you as well. I was afraid I'd miss you," Cullen's breath was a little labored from his brisk walk over to her. He looked as though he was about to say something else, but wasn't able to find the words. Hawke looked at him with both her eyebrows drawn together. It was rare to ever see the Knight Captain this flustered. Whatever was on his mind, he was obviously going to need a little help in spilling it out.

"Cullen," she smiled drawing his attention back to her. He grinned widely and took a step closer to her.

"I just wanted to see how you are doing," he only held her gaze for a moment and then looked down to his feet. "I haven't seen you in a while. You are doing well?"

Hawke chuckled and readjusted the sword in her arms. "As well as I can be, I suppose."

"That's really good," he looked down again and Hawke noticed his cheeks turning a slight red hue. "That's really good," he repeated.

"Yes, well. I'll just be going Knight Captain," she warily extended her hand to him. "It was nice to catch up," she laughed as she shook his hand.

"Yes, perhaps we can talk again soon," Cullen smiled back at her.

"Perhaps," she grinned, unsure how to take his awkward demeanor. As she walked towards the ferry it was clear to her that she would be hearing from him again soon. Most likely receive a dire letter requesting her aide for a hopeless assignment that no one else had the balls to handle. She sighed and blew some stray hairs out of her face.

As they boarded the ferry she felt Fenris grip her waist and pull her to him. She looked over to him from the corner of her eye. His jaw was set tightly and she could see the muscles constricting, he looked more uncomfortable than anything. And as soon as their feet hit the boat he let go of her and retreated to a secluded corner away from prodding eyes.

Hawke let out a frustrated sigh. At least he was trying she had to remind herself. A few weeks ago she would be lucky if he even smiled at her when in the company of others.

She looked over to him, only his spiky shoulder guard gave his position away as it peeped from around the corner of a beam. She wished she could scream it from the rooftops that the two of them were now together. But his hesitancies were understood. After having so many things she loved taken from her, it was easy to see the appeal of taking things slow. This way if things didn't work out, it would be much easier to let go. No one but the two of them knew anything had ever happened to begin with.

She shook her head. Why would she even think such a thing? She was condemning them to failure before it had barely started. No, this would work. She would make this work. She had to. Now that she knew what it was like to have him in her life in this way, an ear to listen, a shoulder to lean on, going back was not an option.

She pushed herself off the railing and walked over to his secluded corner. His face was clearly agitated and he didn't look up when she approached. Hawke looked around to ensure that they were alone before she slipped her hand up his jaw and cradled his cheek, pulling his face to look at her. "I'm sorry you had to tag along all day," she smiled and ran her fingers through his hair. Fenris leaned into her touch then looked around before he placed a hand at her hip and guided her to stand between his legs. Hawke began massaging his scalp, now with both hands, drawing a pleasured groan from his throat. "How can I make it up to you?" She asked with the utmost sincerity, but was quite aware that his mind most certainly wandered to naughty places.

He groaned and gripped her thighs pulling her closer to him. "There are a few things that come to mind," his deep husky voice sent shivers down her spine. Her whole body began to tingle as he ran his hands from her thighs to her lower back and down again.

The blush building on her face was a dead giveaway to the effect he had on her. Instead of countering with something equally sensual, she giggled and leaned into him, burying her head into his neck. "Oh, Fenris. The things you do to me." She pulled back to look at him in the eyes. "It's just not fair you know!"

He smiled and pulled her closer to him, grateful for the privacy this corner of the ferry offered. Showing her affection had become his new drug and he had quickly become addicted. When alone he could never keep his hands off her. The need to have her near him all the time was becoming overwhelming. He let his hands trail circles along her back as he breathed in her scent. "Will you be coming to the Hanged Man tonight," he asked and placed a soft kiss to her cheek.

"If that is where you will be," she grinned and rubbed the tip of his nose with her own.

"Approaching the Docks!" The loud mouthed driver yelled. Both Hawke and Fenris pushed off one another instinctively, moving to opposite sides of the ferry, not wanting to get caught in a lover's embrace; though Hawke knew the idea bothered Fenris much more than her.

When they reached Lowtown the two went their separate ways. He was joining Varric at the Hanged Man and she delivering Aveline the new sword, but agreed to meet up later that evening.

Hawke stepped close to him and raised herself up just a little on her tip toes. Fenris knew she wanted a kiss, and he wanted to give it her. But this tension, this uneasiness he felt with all these eyes on him. He couldn't bring himself to do it. Instead he smiled and brushed his fingers along her abdomen. A small gesture but one of the only ones he was willing to give in public. Hawke grinned and kissed the air between them before walking away.

* * *

><p>When Hawke walked into the Hanged Man Fenris felt his stomach automatically tighten as she began moving towards their table. He immediately regretted not saving a seat for her, because now the only one available was across the table from him. She smiled and greeted everyone there, but Fenris saw her grin widen a little more and linger a little longer when she made eye contact with him. This was the last thing he needed, he was already losing miserably to Varric and Isabela. Now with her here he wouldn't stand a chance at getting his money back. She was definitely a distraction, a welcomed one, but a distraction still.<p>

Isabela watched with great interest as Hawke took the open seat across from Fenris. Even as Merrill continued to talk her ear off, her eyes lingered on him. The smile spreading wider and wider the longer she looked at him. As casually as she could she turned her attention to Fenris who was looking just as love sick back at her. In the years she had known him she was certain she had never seen him grin that stupidly before. Maker, if they knew how ridiculous they looked.

"Want me to deal you in, Hawke," Varric asked as the new game began.

Hawke was terrible at cards. Her face was too easy to read and any time she had ever attempted playing them, she walked home with her tail between her legs and an empty coin purse. "No thanks, Varric. You know how awful I am," she smiled in his direction.

"If you are interested I would be willing to teach you," Fenris burst in.

"I would like that," Hawke leaned forward on the table in his direction and smiled from ear to ear.

Isabela rolled her eyes. Could they be any more obvious? It would be so much better if they just came out with it. It wasn't like everyone didn't know already. Growing tired of the ever growing sweetness filling the air as the two of them stared at one another longingly she excused herself to go to the bar, leaving the seat next to Fenris now open.

As soon as the pirate was gone, Fenris looked over to Hawke and with the slightest of nods beckoned her to come to him. Trying to look as inconspicuous as possible she got up from her seat and walked over to the empty spot on the bench, sliding in next to him. Despite having plenty of room on either side of them, both scooted as close to the other as possible. Fenris was having a very difficult time controlling his desire to place an arm around her or lean in to place a kiss on her soft lips. In an effort to sate his need he used the cover of the table to hook his leg around hers. Hawke smiled up at him and he felt her hand slowly rub along his thigh until it rested on his knee, hidden from the prodding eyes of those around them. He playfully rocked his knee against her and tilted his head flashing her his crooked grin. Immediately Hawke could feel the butterflies swarming in her stomach. Trying to hide the blush building on her cheeks she propped her elbows on the table and took a long swig from her ale.

"Who in the void invited the Knight Captain," Anders nervously asked and turned quickly back towards their table.

Hawke looked up to see Cullen making his way towards her table. He smiled brightly as he approached and she thought, alright this is it. Now is the time he is going to ask me for that huge favor. "How did you find me," she playfully asked and smiled as he approached.

"Actually it wasn't that hard. Just asked a few people on the streets if they knew where I could find the Champion. Apparently you really like your ale," he grinned. "May I join you?"

Hawke gestured with her hand for him to take the open seat across from her. He nervously began twiddling his thumbs and idly looking around at everyone at the table. Oh, this one was gonna be bad, she thought waiting for him to speak. He looked up at her and smiled nervously. "Oh, what is it, Cullen," she asked growing tired of his odd behavior.

He cleared his throat and began rubbing the back of his neck. "You look really… pretty tonight, Hawke."

"I look _pretty_?" she chuckled. "Cullen, are you trying to butter me up?" She smiled and leaned across the table. "I see through your flattery. Now out with it. What is that you want," she raised her eyebrow at him.

"I think I have an idea," Isabela whispered from over her shoulder. Fenris and Hawke both turned back to look at her. And for the first time Hawke noticed the tightness of his jaw and the crease building on his forehead. Unsure on what was troubling him she turned back to Cullen. He was still grinning like an idiot back at her.

"I just wanted to see you," Cullen cleared his throat. "You know away from the Gallows."

"Well, you've seen me," she smiled and downed the rest of her ale. "Anybody need anything?" When no one responded she squeezed Fenris knee and retreated to the bar.

Cullen watched her retreating back with great interest. Fenris was starting to see red, but knew this was his entire fault. If he was willing to be more open about their relationship he wouldn't be in this predicament at all. The idea to keep their romance under wraps until he felt more comfortable was beginning to seem more stupid as the day passed. There was certainly nothing to be ashamed of.

"So," Cullen began. "You all are Hawke's friends. What kind of things does she like?"

"Why do you ask," Isabela leaned towards him.

"Well, Hawke _is_ a remarkable woman," he smirked.

"What makes you think she would be interested in you," Anders chimed in, perhaps a little more aggressive than necessary.

"Well," Cullen started slowly, sensing the animosity around the table. "I can assure you that my intentions with your friend are admirable. And if you don't mind me saying so, I think we would make a great match. I have a lot of things to offer her."

"She likes the Viscount's gardens," Merrill light heartedly told him, but upon feeling everyone's piercing gazes quickly countered, "at least I think so."

"The gardens. Alright. I think Meredith would let me…" he trailed off as Hawke approached with her new drink and slid next to Fenris.

It was obvious tension was high at the table. She took a long draw from her drink, nearly downing it again before looking at Cullen.

He was staring back at her nervously. The scene before him couldn't have been more intimidating. All except Aveline was there that night. Her companions formed a sort of wave of around her body, taking up seats around her. Isabela leaned on the back of her chair and Fenris didn't break his stare, hands clenched together on the table. Hawke and Merrill seemed to be the only ones not exuding animosity at the moment. But it was rare that Hawke was ever alone, he came here for a purpose. After all the years of silently waiting and hoping for her to make a move, it was now painfully obvious that she had no intention of doing so. If he wanted to take their professional relationship to a more intimate one he would have to just be out with it. He cleared his throat and tried to prepare himself for this very embarrassing moment. "Hawke, I was wondering if you would like to go to the gardens."

"Why would I want to do that," she laughed. "What's in the gardens?"

She wasn't going to make this easy it seemed. "Well, I just thought that the flowers are all in bloom this time of year. It's quite beautiful. Maybe you would like it."

Hawke shook her hands in the air in disbelief. "Let me get this straight. You came all the way down here to ask me if I want to go see the gardens?" She laughed and finished the rest of her ale. "Those must be _some_ gardens." She rose from her seat. "Look sorry to cut this evening short, but I'm tired. I want to go home and get a good night's sleep for a change."

Both Fenris and the Knight Captain stood to their feet and simultaneously spoke. "I'll walk you home."

Hawke chuckled and looked between the two men. "No offense Cullen, but the docks are that way," she pointed with her finger. "And I live this way," she pointed in the opposite direction. "I think Fenris can manage getting me home just fine." She laced her arm around his in a non-intimate way and began leading them out of the bar.

As soon as they were far enough from the bar to offer privacy, Hawke intertwined their hands and leaned against his shoulder. They walked slowly neither one speaking to the other.

Fenris was having a difficult time keeping his thoughts from running everywhere at once. Why was Cullen so interested in Hawke all of a sudden? Was he ready to be open about their romance? If only to keep men like the Knight Captain from trying to seduce her. Then his thoughts turned sour. What could he ever offer Hawke? A man like Cullen had everything she deserved. He had nothing. Sooner or later this fantasy he was living in would come to an end. Hawke would realize the absurdity of it all and leave him. No it was better that no one knew of their relationship. That would make things easier.

As they reached the steps to Hightown Hawke broke the silence. "Why do you really think Cullen came to the Hanged Man? It couldn't have been just to tell me about the gardens."

"No. I doubt that it was," anger was clear on his voice. "I suspect you will be seeing him again soon," he spat out.

"Maker, I hope not," she sighed. "He's been acting very strange today. I suspect he's about to asking me for something."

Fenris made a displeased sound in his throat. Surely she could not be this blind to his advances.

They continued in silence until they reached her estate. "Will you be coming in?" The hope on her voice was clear, but Fenris had some things he needed to think about.

"Uh, I think I will be going home. I am tired as well," he smiled weakly knowing that she would see through his excuse. He wanted to stay but if he didn't figure all these feelings out the negative thoughts would only get worse.

The forced smile she gave him pained his heart. "See you in the morning then." She leaned in to give him a kiss. The sound of a drunken couple walking through the courtyard caused Fenris to tense and reactively pull away from her.

Even though his reaction hurt her, Hawke tried not to let it show on her face. If she was going to love Fenris, she was going to love all of him. Waiting for him was worth it. He would come around…eventually.

At least she hoped so.

"Good night," she whispered and retreated to her house.

Fenris sighed as her door closed. Why she dealt with all his ridiculous nuances was beyond him. He rubbed his head and contemplated going in anyways, but decided against it, and retreated to his mansion.

* * *

><p>Hawke tossed and turned the moment she put her head against the pillow. No matter how much she tried sleep wouldn't claim her.<p>

When she heard her bedroom door open and close she didn't even flinch. They had done this song and dance so many times in the last month it was expected.

After getting some time to sort out his thoughts, he would miss her. Pacing in front of his fireplace and tossing and turning in his own bed did nothing to placate him.

The familiar sound of his armor jingling as he removed it, caused her to turn over towards him. With the fire nearly out only a light orange glow resonated from the hearth. She could barely make out his form as he walked towards her bed. She readjusted herself to give him room to lie next to her, and then folded the covers back. He slid in and without speaking to one another they brought their lips together. As he cradled her face he tried to remind himself that she wanted him, that she could have refused his confession. Instead she embraced him, tolerated his mood swings and this ridiculous aversion to public affection.

When the kiss ended she wrapped her arms around his torso and pulled herself into him, burying her head under his chin. Fenris propped on arm above his head and pushed his lips onto her forehead as he began running his fingers through her hair. The two shifted around one another until both were comfortable and then within minutes drifted off to sleep.

* * *

><p>The next morning he rolled over to see her already fully clothed standing in front of her armoire. He groaned and reached out for her. "Why are you dressed?"<p>

She smiled and crawled across the bed to him. "Because it's time to get up." She began smoothing out his messy hair, running her fingers through it and trying to tame some of the more wild strands. "Do you want to sleep in a little longer?"

He ran his hands up her thigh and then quickly turned her onto her back. "Only if you stay with me," he growled into her neck trailing soft kisses from one side to the other.

"Fenris," she giggled. "I'm already dressed…"

"I am happy to assist you with that problem," he began pulling on her belt.

Her body began naturally reacting to his and she couldn't help her legs from wrapping around his body. He groaned and pivoted his hips against her. "Fenris!" her plea was only half-hearted as it was perfectly obvious that she was more than willing.

A knock at her door ended their playing. "Messere," Bodahn called. "The Knight Captain is here to see you. He says it's quite important."

Fenris groaned and rolled off of her. "What does he want," she looked to Fenris then called louder to Bodahn. "Tell him I'll be right down." She crawled over to Fenris and placed a kiss to the tip of his nose. "I won't be long," she assured him and placed one more kiss to his cheek before exiting the room.

Fenris sighed and splayed his body across the bed. How often did Cullen come to see her at her home? Was this a regular occurrence? Where there other men who visited her that he was unaware of?

Without getting fully dressed, he walked to her door and tried to listen in on their conversation.

"Hawke, I know Aveline is your friend. That's why I came to you first," the Knight Captain spoke to her. Fenris dared to open the door a little more so he could hear them better.

"Thank you, Cullen." He heard her soft footsteps move to the fireplace. "She is one of the oldest friends I have. You understand that I cannot let this claim go. After all she has done for this city, I will not sit back while her name is slandered."

Fenris walked out on the balcony, trying to hide himself as well as possible from detection. He watched as Cullen moved behind Hawke and placed a hand at her shoulder. "I promise I will do all I can to ensure that this doesn't get out of hand. But I do have to follow up on any reports I get."

Hawke turned back to look at him with a smile on her face. Fenris sneered and watched as the Knight Captain left his hand firmly on her. "I understand." The two began walking towards her door shielding them from his spying eyes. He stomped back into her room and began pacing back and forth in front of her fireplace.

When Hawke returned she moved straight to her desk to prop herself up while she kicked her boots off, not even noticing Fenris anger.

"What did Cullen want," he called from over her shoulder.

"Someone's been making reports about Aveline. Lies, I'm sure. But he has to investigate," she responded and moved to take off her other boot.

"Could he not have sent a letter to tell you this? Why come to your home?" He walked to stand behind her unable to hide the anger on his voice.

"I don't know." Sensing the hostility permeating off him she turned to face him. "Fenris, what's this about?"

The care and concern was evident in her voice and it made Fenris feel foolish. "Nothing," he began to move away from her, but she reached out and grabbed his wrist pulling him back to her.

She moved to sit on the desk and brought his body between her legs. "You can tell me what's bothering you," she smiled and ran her fingers up his chest.

He gripped one hand and brought his lips down to kiss the back of her knuckles. "It's just…" he hesitated unsure if he wanted to appear this vulnerable, and then decided that this was Hawke. It was okay with her. "Cullen…he seems to be really taken with you," he softly spoke without looking her in the eyes.

"I see." She moved her hands up to his neck and curled her fingers around his head. "Fenris, there is only one man who could ever hold my heart, and that is you." He lifted his head to look at her and saw all the love and admiration in her eyes. "You have absolutely nothing to ever be worried about. There will always be only you," she smiled and cradled his cheek before bringing him in for a slow kiss that quickly turned a little more passionate as her hands began roaming across his chest.

Fenris raked his hands up her thighs and pushed her skirt up past her hips, pulling her to the edge of the desk. Hawke wrapped her legs around his body and pulled her shirt up over her head, breaking their kiss only when the fabric moved in front of her face. With her torso exposed Fenris let his hands roam across her stomach, waist, back, any flesh he could feel. He groaned and moved his lips down to her neck, gently sucking and licking the sensitive flesh there.

Hawke let out a heavy breath and rocked her body against him. As Fenris placed kisses up and down her neck, across her collarbone, and to the other side, Hawke let her head fall back and enjoy the sensation of his lips on her skin, his body between her legs.

When satisfied with the attention he gave her neck, Fenris moved his mouth back up to hers and gripped the back of her head firmly as he slipped his hand down between her legs.

With two fingers he hooked her small clothes and pushed them to the side as he brought his fingers inside her. Hawke bucked and gasped at the sensation, and began naturally moving with him. He broke the kiss and pressed their foreheads together, intent on watching her face while he worked her. Hawke tried to tilt her head back, but his grip would only tighten so she opened her eyes at looked directly in his to let him see the pleasure only he could give her.

Fenris was unsatisfied with the angle his hand had. Her underwear constricted his goal. In one swift movement he pulled his fingers out of her and shot them down the front of her small clothes pushing them in again. Hawke's eyes rolled back in her head as he pumped his fingers in and out. Sensing his frustration with her clothes, Hawke brought her hands down and shimmied herself out of them quickly. Once free she spread her legs wide and leaned back on her desk, letting him have full access to her body.

As his thumb began drawing circles on her sensitive flesh she felt the heat building, the blood pumping, her breaths quickening. His grip on her neck never faltered. He never tore his eyes from her face. He wanted to watch her. He wanted to see the pleasure he was giving her. This excited her and she leaned into his arm, desperately kissing any skin she could feel. As her body began rocking in rhythm with his hand Hawke heard Fenris growl deep his throat. It was coming too quickly. She wasn't ready for this to be over, she wanted more.

"Now Fenris," she pleaded. "I want it now."

Never breaking eye contact and not once releasing his hold on her neck, in a quick movement, Fenris removed his fingers and used that hand to free himself from his pants. Without hesitation he gripped her hip and pulled her to the edge of the desk.

Hawke cried out and threw her head back as he filled her. Not giving her time to adjust to his girth, he began frantically pumping into her. Each time their bodies connected Hawke arched her back and lifted herself up to meet him. It was coming, the burning, the heat, the pure ecstasy of feeling him inside began rising. Just a few more thrusts….

She didn't know if she could take this anymore.

Her whole body felt like it was on fire.

And then a wail of pleasure echoed through her room as she frantically pressed herself to him, rocking back and forth against his pelvis.

Once her breathing became a little more steady Fenris picked her up in his arms and began carrying her over to the bed. She wrapped herself around him and brought her lips to his, kissing him like her life depended on it. The feeling of his tongue against hers, the softness of his lips as they closed around hers, she moaned into his mouth and began rocking against him again as he carried her.

It was an awkward walk, with his pants at his knees. He had to try extra hard not trip, but Maker, the feeling of her in his hands, her body pressed as tightly to him as he could get her. Her magnificent tongue dancing with his. He needed this. He needed to know that she was his. When he felt the bed behind them he placed her down on to it and kicked his pants off. Taking only a moment to collect himself before hooking his arms under her thighs and pulling her to the edge. A little slower this time he entered her. He paid extra attention to the way her body naturally responded to his, the look on her face as he pushed in and out of her, the rise and fall of her breast as he began moving faster. Every moan, every whimper that escaped her lips did not go unnoticed. He needed her, needed to know that he was good enough.

Watching himself go in and out of her, feeling her muscles tighten around him. This was by far the greatest gift he'd ever known. And she willingly gave it to him. Hawke brought her hand to her forehead and held onto his wrist with the other. The look on her face spoke volumes. Anything he ever desired of her she would give freely. She loved this, she loved him. The realization sent tingles down his body. He groaned and gripped her thighs tighter. The sound of his name whispered from her lips made his knees weak. He leaned over her on the bed, propping himself up on his elbows and nestled his fingers in her hair. They moved back to give him room. Once settled he began moving against her again. His thrusts were slow, drawn out so he could feel every sensation her body had to offer.

He looked down to see their bodies connecting.

Every push from him was met with a roll of her hips.

When he looked back her eyes were closed, her face was caught in a look of pure ecstasy. She leaned into his arm and began panting in time with his movements. He was certain that she could never look more radiant than she did in this moment. Completely open and unguarded. Her hair disheveled, a gleam of sweat on her skin, her lips pouted and slightly open. She was stunning. But Fenris knew that tomorrow and every day after that she would only become more beautiful to him.

As he continued to move against her, he buried his face in her neck and whispered his love for her in broken Arcanum, unable to find any words suitable in her tongue. When Hawke whispered her love back, Fenris lost himself, unable to hold on any longer in the intensity of the moment. After giving a few more frazzled thrusts he collapsed next to her with one hand still nestled in her hair. He closed his eyes and focusing on returning his breathing to normal.

As he lay on his chest he turned his head to look at her. She looked so peaceful with her eyes closed still breathing heavy. He heard her let out a contented sigh as she began brushing her fingers up and down his forearm. She was his, she loved him. He rubbed his thumb across her forehead and thought about how happy she made him. His entire life he felt as if a piece of himself was missing. He had found it in her. She made him whole again.

"Hawke?"

"Hmm?" She didn't open her eyes, but nuzzled herself a little closer to him.

"Do I make you happy?" Fenris was a little embarrassed at how self-conscious the question seemed, but even he needed reassurances from time to time.

She smiled from ear to ear and nodded a yes at him. Hawke scooted over and kissed his shoulder. Fenris rolled onto his side and brushed his hand up and down her narrow waist.

"Why do you ask?" She looked at him from under her eyelashes and began rubbing circles across his back.

"I don't know. You make me happy." He sighed knowing how ridiculous he sounded. "Sometimes I worry that I might not do the same for you." It was rare for him to be so honest about his emotions, but it this was going to work, and Maker did he want it to, he would have to give a little.

She smiled and leaned up on her elbow. "There is nothing in my life that makes me happier than you do. I am so lucky to have you." As she brought her hand up to run through his hair she nuzzled her nose against his neck. "I love you, Fenris."

He couldn't stop the smile from spreading across his face and he pulled her into a strong embrace. "I will always be only yours," he whispered before kissing her on the cheek.

* * *

><p>Later that night the two joined their companions at the Hanged Man again. And for once Fenris didn't mind all the stares as he put his arm around Hawke and pulled her close to him on their bench.<p>

He didn't mind the giggles whenever he cradled her face in his hands and kissed her forehead.

Or all of the open gawking when she wrapped her hand up his neck and whispered "I love you," in his ear.

Or any of the hoots and hollers when he brought his lips to hers and locked her in a deep kiss for the entire bar to witness.

She had chosen him, and he was proud of that.

She could have had any other man in Thedas, but Hawke chose Fenris.

**Thank you for reading...never written sexy time before. Let me know if it was too much or too little. Kinda nervous about reactions to it. **


	3. Desire

**A/N: I wrote this in like 2 hours. And it is pure SMUT. I couldn't get this out of my head, so I had to write it. This falls somewhere in the dead years between Act II and III. I promise not all my writing will be just sex with these two, but the last ones just sort of happened. Don't get me wrong there will definetly be more smut to come, but I also plan on writing more one shots just about their relationship in general. Keep in mind this was very spur of the moment. **

**I would also like to thank everyone who has reviewed my stories. You all have been so kind and helpful. It has really given me motivation to continue writing. **

**So Warning: SMUT! SMUT! SMUT!**

She didn't intend to stumble upon him as she came back from her bathing. Her _intention_ was to retreat back to her tent drawing as little attention as possible while only wearing her tight tank top and barely there under shorts. She hadn't anticipated him wandering around in her direction trying to collect firewood.

He had seen her coming, her perfectly proportioned curves silhouetted by the moonlight. His stomach tightened and he looked away as quickly as possible. For six months he had done nothing but daydream about feeling her body against his again. But that ship had sailed. He had destroyed any possibility of a physical relationship with her again he was sure.

"Do you need some help carrying that back," he heard her ask from over his shoulder.

"Don't trouble yourself, Hawke. I can manage." It was painful how badly he wanted to scoop her up in his arms and take her right there on the ground. He couldn't look at her, this desire was burning too fiercely with all the wine and innocent flirting they had been participating in all evening.

When he heard her footsteps approach he tensed and breathed loudly through his nostrils trying to control this yearning. She bent down in front of him, exposing her normally concealed cleavage to him. "It's no trouble Fenris, really," she smiled from ear to ear and reached to grab some of the wood he was collecting.

The way her body subtly moved, causing her chest to jerk and bounce as she helped him, made him clear his throat nervously.

She looked up at him from under her eyelashes and grinned then shifted her body, bringing her backside painfully close to his face as she gathered more wood.

Fenris took the time to thoroughly examine her smooth curves. His eyes following the line of her lower back down to her exposed thighs. His mouth started salivating as he imagined touching her, caressing her, squeezing her.

"See something you like," she playfully asked looking at him from over her shoulder.

Fenris jerked at being caught and inadvertently pricked his finger on the firewood in his hand. "Fasta Vass," he cursed and jumped to his feet gripping the tip of his index finger with his other hand.

"I'm sorry," she exclaimed. "I didn't mean to startle you. Here let me take a look."

"It's nothing, Hawke," he rolled his eyes and pulled his hand away from her.

"Don't be such a baby," she grinned and tore his finger from his grasp. "Looks like you caught a splinter." With the hem of her shirt she wiped the small drop of blood off then pressed her finger to his applying pressure to stop the bleeding.

Her eyes never left his as they stood on the base of the cliff. The warm breeze blowing her scent in his direction. There were flashes of something in her eyes. Hints of desire, perhaps the same longing he felt. Fenris felt his stomach drop as she took a step closer to him and brought her lips to the side of his finger.

He was paralyzed as she trailed a mixture of kisses and tongue up to the tip. As she brought the pad of his finger into her mouth, his arm went limp and all he could do was watch as she flicked her tongue against it, and then took it further into her mouth, twirling the skilled muscle around it. She hummed in her throat when she reached the bottom. With her mouth still closed raked her teeth back up, before pulling it out.

"Is that better," she looked up to him and smiled as she kissed the side of his finger once more.

"Yes," his voice shook out much deeper than his normal tone.

Her lip curled up on one side then she moved to pick up their abandoned firewood. Fenris stood frozen, eyeing his finger, unable to think or move until he heard her giggle as she made her way back to camp.

He quickly tried to compose himself and picked up a bundle himself before following behind her.

When he entered the camp she was depositing her portion of the wood next to the fire. She said her goodnights to all their companions then made her way back to her tent. Just as she opened the flap she looked back to Fenris from over her shoulder and gave him a heated smile, promising him things that would come if he only followed her.

He cleared his throat and looked around the camp, trying to come up with a reason to go in after her. There was none. Either he did and everyone would see, or he would have to wait until everyone had gone to bed risking the loss of her new boldness.

Not sure what his action should be, he moved to the log nearest her tent to contemplate. Luckily, for him Varric had chosen that exact moment to spin a ridiculously wild tale that had all their friends completely captivated gathering around him at the other end of the camp. Fenris took this opportunity to slip under the flap of her tent as inconspicuously as possible.

He took a moment to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Only a small amount of light was allowed in through crack and a larger hole in the ceiling.

When confident he slipped himself under her bedding drawing himself as close to her as he could.

"Fenris," she whispered with her back to him.

"Where you expecting someone else," he breathed on her neck and planted a soft kiss there.

She sighed with pleasure and pushed her backside into him. His lips began moving up and down her neck as his hand slid slowly up her thigh. When he reached the hem of her shorts he pushed his fingers under them, letting his hand splay across her hip. He gripped her tightly and pulled her further into him.

Hawke moaned and stretched her neck out to give him better access as she brought a hand behind her head to bury her fingers in his hair.

High on the fact that he was being allowed to touch her at all, Fenris ran his hand up her waist before cupping the bottom of her breast. Then let his fingers spread across it, feeling her excitement. He groaned deep in his throat, suddenly needing to feel her bare skin beneath his hand.

Finding the base of her shirt easily, he hooked his hand under and pushed the fabric up until her chest was completely exposed. As his fingers ghosted her them, Hawke gasped and moved her hand to his hip pushing herself into him.

Feeling frustrated at not being able to fully feel his body as he was being allowed to feel hers, Hawke rolled over to face him and hooked a leg over his side rolling her hips as she did so.

Fenris moan and quickly found her lips, finally able to give them the attention he desired. Her mouth was warm and hot, and as their tongues connected he felt all the nerves in him tingle with ecstasy. He buried his hand in her hair, and in a firm, but gentle grip pulled her over to straddle him.

Once on top, Hawke abandoned her shirt and quickly went to removing his, stopping to kiss his newly exposed skin and rock her hips against him as she did so. With both their chest finally bare, she leaned over him and cradled his face in her hands, devouring his lips, claiming his mouth, owning his desire.

Feeling her bare torso rub against him was causing him to quickly lose himself. Her soft skin rubbing against his abdomen, her firm breast ghosting over his chest as she tilted her head back and forth to deepen the intensity of her kiss. Fenris gripped her thighs and pushed himself up to her, letting her feel how incredibly ready for her he was.

Only their heaving breathing and the occasional gasp for air was heard in the tent. Somewhere off in the distance he could still hear Varric going on wildly about his tale, so he still felt confident that for the time being they were allowed some privacy.

Hawke left his lips and began trailing kisses down his jaw until she found his ear. Her tongue traced the outline and Fenris moaned as he gripped her breast his hands once more.

"I'm willing if you are, Fenris," her hot breath trickled into his ear followed by her tongue.

"Addictus ut viam sentis, Hawke," he responded not even aware that it was in his native tongue.

She heard the desire in his voice, even if she couldn't understand the words, and moved herself off of him to shed her shorts. Upon seeing her action, he followed and kicked his pants off as well.

Slowly Hawke replaced her body over his, and gripped his length in her hands. She ran a few pumps against him, effectively releasing a moan from his mouth, before she dragged the tip over her opening.

Fenris felt his whole body tense in anticipation as she repeated the action and he found himself grateful for the small gap in the top of her tent, casting a white glow over her body.

Once he felt his tip enter her body, he gripped her waist and choked on his breath as she slid all the way down. Hawke rested in this position for a moment allowing her body to adjust to him before she began using the strong muscles of her thighs to push herself up and down on him.

She threw her head back and moaned, perhaps a little too loudly, while her hands found extra support on his lower stomach.

Fenris let the beauty of her naked body riding him permanently be engraved into his memory. His hands roamed up and down her thighs and back up to her waist as she continued to move above him. Each time her body came down he added an extra thrust with his to deepen himself within her.

Hawke breathed his name and he felt her short fingernails scrape along his stomach. The desire to feel her body against him again was too much and he slowly sat up.

Taking every inch of her body in, he kissed up and down her neck as she gently rocked against him. Not able to feel him at the intensity she wanted, Hawke leaned back on her hands, arching her back as she guided herself over him.

Having the core of the bodies now illuminated by the small opening in the top of her tent, made Fenris make an almost embarrassing moan. But both were too completely captivated by the feel of each other's bodies to notice. He too leaned back on his hands and worked to meet each of her movements.

He tore his eyes from the meeting of their bodies and followed the line of hers. Her small waist was rolling and extending in movement, her breast bounced slowly with the timing of their thrust. Her hand trailed up the length of her stomach and on to her neck before scraping its way into her hair.

Fenris watched in awe as this Goddess before him found pleasure in his body.

As she moved her hand back down her face looked to him. Her eyes were full of the euphoria he was causing her, her lips were pouted out in bliss. As she noticed him eyeing her she tilted her head and let the slightest of smiles spread across her face. Fenris couldn't help but return it and then quickly needed to feel her against him again.

He hooked her legs and gently pushed her back onto the ground, but quickly realized how fast this may end now that he was allowed to keep the pace. With one hand he held on to her shoulder and with the other he gripped her leg pushing her wider for him.

He moved at a fierce, deep pace. Grunting each time he felt himself bury to the hilt inside her.

Hawke's moans were quickly getting loader as he continued to lunge into her. She gripped his shoulders and he could feel her body tensing around him. Each thrust only elicited a greater response from her and he sensed the end coming.

Hawke suddenly let out a high pitched moan, and Fenris heard giggles from outside the tent. He gripped her shoulder and pushed hard into her as he whispered, "Shhh," into her ear.

"Fenris…I can't…It's too much," she responded through her labored breathing.

He moved his arm from underneath her shoulder and used his hand to cover her mouth, hoping to drown out some of the sound.

The effect only intensified her moans, and she wailed into his hand. He looked over to see her eyes rolling back, she pushed her head into his hand and arched fiercely into him, pumping her hips wildly against him. Seeing her lose control like this caused him to completely abandon any attempt to hold out any longer.

He pushed harder and faster into her, groaning and grunting loudly as he did so. His hand slipped off her mouth and she soon followed in her own wails of pleasure.

The sound of their climaxes and their bodies pushing together were the only sounds Fenris could hear. Though he was completely aware of their possible audience and was certain Hawke was too, but both were too caught up in the moment to care.

When spent and sure that she was as well, he slowed his pace until it completely stopped.

He lay on top of her struggling to find breath, willing the feeling in his limbs to return.

"Over already," he heard Isabela cackle from a few yards away. "That sounded like it was just starting to get good."

Hawke covered her mouth to suppress the giggle from escaping, and Fenris felt his body shake with laughter as he buried his head into the crook of her neck trying to hide his embarrassment.

"Fenris," Hawke whispered when the talk and laughter outside the tent ended.

He propped himself up on his elbow and looked down at her, only able to see a fraction of her face in the small light of the tent.

"Promise me we won't wait another six months before we do this again," she smiled.

His lip curled up and he leaned into her face. "Woman, you'll be lucky if I can wait a few hours."

**I know they don't techinally get back together until three years after Fenris's infamous "it's not you it's me" speech. But hey who says they couldn't have been maybe friends with benefits that whole time and then rekindled their _true_ romance later? I vote friends with benefits, and possibly the occasional cuddling!**


	4. Sewers

**A/N: So this is a short one. I felt like the dialogue options when Anders confronts you about the relationship with Fenris were lacking. This is just my take on the whole thing. Kinda makes Anders look like an ass. And gets a little mushy at the end. **

**Thanks to kristenkrios, fanglickingood, and Those who call me T.I.M for your super kind words on all my chapters. Everyone else has been wonderfully nice as well and I greatly appreciate all the reviews, favorites, and alerts. **

Hawke was beginning to feel nauseous. Wandering around in a sewer looking for waste? Ugh…Anders better worship the ground she walks on from here on out.

Wait. Scratch that. That might prove to be problematic. But seriously, could he have asked for a more disgusting need of her help?

As they searched every nook and cranny of the filth that rested under Darktown, Hawke walked over to Fenris and ran her hand across the small of his back. "I'm so sorry. I _promise_ I will make this up to you." He turned into her as she dragged her arms around his torso and brought him into a loose embrace.

"It's no trouble," he sighed and brushed some loose strands of hair out of her face. "But if he looks at me with that sneer one more time…" he trailed off letting the seriousness of his tone carry his intent.

"He does seem extra moody today doesn't he?" Hawke looked back over to Anders and noticed him mumbling to himself as he kicked rocks around.

Fenris made a displeased sound in his throat and Hawke leaned into him squeezing his chest to her before letting go to grab his hand while they continued searching.

After what felt like hours, Anders called to her and asked that she help him search one of the last side rooms. She rolled her eyes to Fenris and squeezed his fingers in hers before leaving to help him.

When Hawke retreated he decided that he had grown tired of this ridiculous task and decided to just wait for them to finish. He rested himself right outside the room they were searching and closed his eyes, trying hard to drown out the horrid smell of this place.

"Are you sure about Fenris," Anders broke through the silence of the sewers. His eyes flew open and he immediately took up an aggressive stance. How dare he question her feelings for him! Anders and Hawke were barely even friends anymore and he had the nerve to poke his nose in their business. After all he had gone through with her, after all the heartache felt on both sides, he would be damned if this filthy abomination tried to ruin it. He was mere inches away from stomping into the room, but Hawke's response cut off his advance.

"YOU must be joking." He settled back against the wall to listen to how she would handle this. "No offense, Anders, but you are probably the last person who should be questioning _my_ decisions," she added trying not to lose her temper. "I mean we are down in a sewer looking through waste to try and find some fabled cure for your…your…situation."

"No need to be cruel, Hawke," Anders cast his eyes down and turned away from her. "I wished someone would have been there to ask me 'Are you sure.' Tried to talk me out of it. But there wasn't. I just don't want to see you get hurt."

"Well, your concern is noted, but not warranted," she tried to sound amicable. After all they were friends, sort of. And he apparently was having a bad day. "Besides," she laughed. "What makes you think I am in any danger of getting hurt?"

"Please," he responded anger and annoyance clear on his voice. "He is more a like a wild dog than a man. Can't you see that he has let one event rule over his life? How can you ever expect someone like him to truly care for you?"

Hawke stalked towards. "Who do you think you are?"

_Whoa, _she thought. This is quickly getting out of hand. She threw her hands up and huffed loudly. "Look, I'm not talking about this."

"Fine," he sneered. "But don't come crawling to me when that beast abandons you…**again**."

That did it. Any restraint she was holding on to was quickly deserted. She took a slow, tense step towards him and clutched her hands into fist. "I assure you that you are the _last_ person I would crawl to. And if you _ever_ speak of him in that way again you will be begging for the Templars to take you before I'm done."

"Don't you see what he's done to you," he gestured his hands wildly. "The Hawke I know would never even think something like that."

"Perhaps it's not him, but you who have brought this out of me," she glared at him then turned away attempting to continue the task so they could be out of this place.

Anders sighed, knowing that perhaps he went about this the wrong way. He did care about her. At one point he thought he might love her, but it hadn't taken long for him to realize that it was a purely one sided love. It was like that elf had cast some spell over her. He never stood a chance.

"Hawke," he began more quietly trying to ease the tension now lingering in the air. "It wasn't my intention to upset you. I'm only trying to help."

"You're such an ass," she whispered as she moved some rocks around.

"Listen to me, damn it. I'm trying to save you this inevitable heartache. You deserve better than him," he pleaded for her to understand.

Hawke sighed and looked to the ceiling before standing to her feet and facing him. "Anders, I _love_ him. That's all there is to it. Nothing you or anyone else says will change that. So can you just drop this? Please?"

"You love him," he crossed his arms at his chest giving her a look of disbelief. "And I take it he loves you?"

"Yes," she added quietly and turned away from him again.

"Are you sure," he narrowed his eyes and took a step closer to her. "He's spoken those words to you?"

"He doesn't have to," she responded confidently. "I know that he does."

Trying to be as calm as possible he moved to stand in front of her, so he could look her in the eyes. "Hawke, a man like Fenris will never be able to love you. Don't be naïve," he brought his hand to her shoulder. "Don't you think you should save yourself the heartache?"

For the briefest of moments his words hit her. Perhaps he didn't love her? But when she turned her face back up to Anders the look of accomplishment in his eyes made her cringe. She jerked away from his touch. "**Never **attempt to speak of this with me again," she gritted through her teeth and quickly turned on her heel away from him.

Hawke was mumbling curses under her breath as she jetted out of the room. She was walking so fast and was so pissed she didn't even notice him standing just outside the door.

His firm grip on her wrist caused her to stop. She turned to see him looking at her with eyes full of concern. "Fenris," she began and moved to him, sorry that he had to hear that entire conversation. She wrapped her arms around his neck. Without giving her a moment to say another word his lips were on hers.

He trailed his hands from the small of her back, then to her waist, and on down to the widest part of her hips. His fingers spread wide then he squeezed before running them across her backside.

Hawke moaned into his mouth and reached up on her tip toes to kiss him more fully. As his hands slid down under her bottom, Fenris picked her straight up in the air and held her tightly to him. She smiled against his lips and brought her fingers to rest across his jaw while she kissed him slowly from this higher than normal vantage point, letting her feet dangle.

While still holding her with one arm hooked beneath her behind, he brought the other to her back and hugged her to him finally breaking their passionate kiss.

After a few seconds of breathing her in, he let her body slide down his, and then placed his hands at her waist. "Can we please get out of here?" She sighed, then smiled up at him and nestled her fingers in his hair. "Orana's making your favorite stew tonight. Will you come for dinner?" She looked up to him hopefully.

"Hmmm," he grinned and leaned into her face. "Count me in," then he kissed the tip of her nose.

Hawke felt a wave of happiness rush over her and she looked back to Anders with a smug grin, hoping that he could read the intent behind it before she walked back towards the exit of the sewers letting her hand trail across Fenris's body.

He gripped her hand and let it linger in his until she was too far out of reach, then turned a fierce gaze to Anders.

The way he stalked into the room made the mage back away from him slowly. He brought his hands up in a semblance of surrender, but before he had time to speak Fenris lit up his lyrium scars and pushed him against the wall.

"If you ever question my love and devotion to her again I will put a fist through your head." He released him then took a step back before continuing. "And I assure you I will not use these to do so," he gestured to the markings across his body.

As he left Anders held his chest for a moment trying to get his breath. He was sure that crazy bastard was going to kill him right then and there. He couldn't imagine what Hawke saw in him.

When he looked to the ground he spotted something peeking out from behind a rock. "Oh, looks like I found another deposit," he spoke surprisingly cheery and reached down to retrieve it, seemingly forgetting everything that had just transpired.

* * *

><p>With his belly full to bursting Fenris walked into Hawke's study and stretched across her couch. He closed his eyes and made a whining noise hating himself for eating so much.<p>

Hawke chuckled when she entered the room. "Eyes too big for your stomach, again?" He made a grunting noise in response but didn't open his eyes. Hawke crawled up next to him on the wide couch and cuddled up under his arm. Despite his full stomach he didn't mind her lying next to him. In fact he found himself perfectly content at the moment. His hand caressed her up and down her waist and pulled her closer to him. Hawke sighed in happiness and wrapped her arm around his torso as she nuzzled her nose into his chest. The two lay in silence enjoying the joy they felt just being in each other's presence and then Fenris finally felt the need to speak.

"For the record, Hawke," his voice was low and serious causing her to prop her head up on his chest to look at him. His hand moved to her face and he rubbed his thumb across her cheekbone. "I _do _love you."

"I know," she smiled and kissed the pad of his thumb, then moved her body up his so she was looking directly down into his face. "And if I'm not mistaken you have for quite a while."

"Perhaps," he grinned, then pulled her face to his to claim her lips. As his mouth opened over hers and the soft heat of her tongue barely traced his, he found himself thinking, _"This is the woman I am meant to grow old with. I will make sure that she knows every day that I cannot live without her."_


	5. Favors

**A/N: This one takes place in the three year gap of their relationship. I figured with all the flirting Isabela swings Fenris's way, Hawke would have to be a little insecure from time to time. And come on, Hawke's the Champion of Kirkwall you know men are digging on her. This is their way of letting each other know that even though they aren't together, there is no one else. I've realized a lot of my stuff is kinda of sweet and mushy. I'll try to find some inspiration for the angst in future chapters. **

**Side Note: I'm curious if I have this posted the correct way. I am new to this whole thing. When I go the Dragon Age home page and sort it by update, my story doesn't show up. Even if I'm not signed in. I always have to do a really refined search to find it. Just want to make sure I'm not doing something wrong. If anybody more experienced would like to help me out I'd really appreciate it. Thanks again for reading, faving, reviewing. I love hearing these little fantasies of mine are enjoyed by other people. So thank you, thank you, thank you!**

* * *

><p>"Look, Fenris I'm just not getting this," Hawke sighed in aggravation and threw her cards down the table.<p>

He chuckled at her annoyance and put the cards back in her hand. "You're getting better. Just stick with it."

"This doesn't make sense," she threw her hand in the air. "I mean this one beats this one, but not if this card is on the table. Red will beat black but only if you are holding a face card. This is too confusing. I don't think I'm capable of getting this right now." She chuckled and took down a big swig on her ale.

"Actually, you're not any better when you're sober," he smirked then brought his own mug to his lips.

Hawke popped him on the shoulder with the back of her hand, and then winced as it connected with his armor. "Damn it, Fenris is it necessary for you to wear that all the time. Sometimes I'd like to just swat at you without having to go to Anders for healing." She rubbed the back of her hand with an exaggerated pout. "That really hurt."

"I didn't realize you were so fragile," he grinned and grabbed her hand to examine it. "Look, not even a scratch."

Without letting go of his hand she leaned into him, nearly enough to brush her nose against his. "Yes, but my pride is terribly wounded," she giggled.

Fenris couldn't help but laugh and pulled her closer to him. The two stared into each other's eyes, both imagining the feel of the other's lips, but neither bold enough to close the distance.

"Gave up did you," Varric interrupted as he sat down at the table.

Slowly Fenris let go of her and leaned back in his chair leaving his arm to drape around the back of hers. "She may be a lost cause," he curled up his lip.

"Gee, thanks," Hawke rolled her eyes. "Maybe I'd be a little better if my teacher had a little more faith in me."

"Some people just don't have the gift, Hawke," Varric shrugged.

Hawke snorted knowing he was right, and then felt Fenris's fingers tracing circles across her shoulder blade. She looked at him from the corner of her eye and noticed that he was idly eyeing all the patrons in the bar. The fact that he was touching her so absentmindedly made her smile to herself as she took a sip from her mug.

It felt like it ages ago since their impromptu love making, but the results had been clear. Something had stirred in both of them. Every time she was in his presence her eyes would dart to his wrist then to the crest that hung across his belt. Seeing them there made her heart swell. Though at the time neither one truly knew what the outcome of the event might be, she believed he had feelings for her. He just needed a little more time than the usual person to sort them out. Granted he was taking a little longer than she expected.

The only problem she had was the fear that while she waited and waited for him, his care for her would dissipate. Perhaps another woman would come along and claim his heart better than she could. It was an insecure thought, she knew. But in her limited experience with men she had learned that they could be incredibly fickle. Although she had no desire to be with anyone besides him, it was unclear what he would do if given the opportunity.

At the perfect moment in her self-deprecating thoughts, Isabela decided to stumble over to their table. Eyes glazed over in drunkenness, the sway of her hips a little more exaggerated, gaze pierced directly on Fenris.

_Geez, this again. _Hawke thought. How many times would she have to sit by and witness her countless passes and flirty innuendos? She didn't have the stomach for this right now, so she got up from her chair and went to get another ale.

Fenris moved to let her pass in front of him and followed the view of her backside all the way to the bar, lingering there until pair of tan legs and a white tunic came into his view. He looked up to see Isabela giving him her come hither eye.

He smiled and took a swig on his beer. "Never going to take a hint are you?"

She swayed over and sat on the table directly in front of him. "Oh come on. You can't expect me to sit back, when such a fine piece of man is just waiting to be claimed." She crossed her legs over his body and propped them up in Hawke's empty chair exposing her bare thigh nearly directly in his face. "Admit it. You've thought about it."

He gazed down at her leg for an instant before looking back up to her. "If only because you constantly bring it up. Trust me if I wanted it, I would have had it by now."

"I believe that," she grinned and leaned towards him before jumping off the table and taking the seat next to him.

While Isabela joined Varric for a few giggles, Fenris turned to the bar trying to find Hawke again. He watched as she toasted her mug with one of the male patrons and both downed the contents. He smiled to himself and was just about to go to her when the man's hand fell to her back. He cradled it in an all too familiar way that made Fenris cringe. As he leaned in and tried to whisper something, Hawke brought her hand to his shoulder and gave him access to her ear. Whatever he said must have been terribly funny, because Hawke threw her head back in laughter and let her hand linger on his arm for longer than Fenris thought necessary. The man called to the bartender and ordered them another drink.

Fenris watched her body language intently, searching to see if this was just mindless drunken flirtation or perhaps something more. Since their night he knew she had not been with anyone else, much to his relief. But a part of him knew that it would only be a matter of time before she grew tired of waiting on him. For the moment he believed she was content with how things were progressing between them, or not progressing depending on how you looked at it. But a woman like Hawke was highly sought after in a place like Kirkwall. If he wasn't careful he may lose her to one of the many men begging for just a chance. He needed more time. If she could just wait a little longer he knew he would be ready to give her what she deserved.

The man leaned into her again, wrapping his arm further around her waist as he whispered in her ear. The way he was rubbing his fingers across her side, the smile showing on his profile made a jealous nerve hit Fenris's stomach. He brought his palms together and watched as Hawke leaned into his ear whispering her response.

She patted him on the shoulder and turned to walk away. A rush of relief filled him before he was jostled by a drunken Isabela going on about a wild tale. She leapt up from her seat and tumbled back towards him.

He moved to keep her from hitting the ground, but Isabela grabbed onto him and planted herself directly in his lap.

She laughed and cackled throwing her arms and legs around wildly. Fenris smiled politely at her and brought his hand to her waist to help her back up to her feet.

"If you want we can continue this up in my room," she leaned into his face as he lifted her up.

He wasn't even able to respond before Hawke slid a new mug of ale across the table to him. When he looked at her she was downing her own mug. As she finished she wiped the excess brew from her mouth.

"I'm going home. See you all in the morning," she announced abruptly then stomped towards the door.

"I'll see that she gets home safely," Fenris rose from the table and immediately went after her.

She only looked once over her shoulder to verify who was running in her direction then continued on her path. As he finally caught up she turned her head over her shoulder. "I am perfectly capable of finding my way home, Fenris."

"I know," he responded. "But I sleep a little better at night knowing that you are returned safely."

"My well-being keeps you up through the night," she gave an amused snort. "That's actually kind of sweet." As they began the climb up the stairs to Hightown she smiled back at him. "Don't worry I won't tell anyone. Wouldn't want to ruin your reputation."

He grinned but didn't respond. They both knew why he cared so much for her safe return. No need going on about it. After they reached the halfway point on the stairs, Fenris found himself thinking again about the man at the bar. He didn't recognize him, but few people in Kirkwall really stood out to him. Unless he talked to them directly he rarely remembered faces. "Who was that man you were speaking to at the Hanged Man?" He asked her as commonly as he could, not wanting her to see why he was so curious.

"Why one?"

He sighed. She knew which one he was speaking of. "The one at the bar."

"Just a friend," she responded nonchalantly.

"A friend," he raised the pitch of his voice in question. "I have never seen you speak with him before."

"Well we aren't that great of friends," she shrugged as they reached the top and entered Hightown. "But I hardly think you know everyone I am friends with. Why do you ask?" She threw him a knowing glance.

"I was merely curious. He looked familiar."

The look she shot him told him that she saw through his lie, but let it go.

As they rounded the corner to her mansion Hawke tripped on a rock that had found its way into the courtyard. It was a small stumble and she most likely would have found her footing without his help, but he reached out for her anyways, relishing in the excuse to touch her.

"Stupid rock," Hawke whispered and relaxed in his arms at her waist. He moved his fingers just a fraction across her sides, and she looked up to him then placed her hands at his shoulders. "Maker, Fenris if you hadn't been here that rock would have surely bested me," she teased. "So good that you decided to walk me home."

"It was my pleasure," he smiled and tilted his head down to her.

The two lingered in the pose for much longer than necessary, neither one willing to let the other go. Grinning, letting the butterflies dance and flutter in their stomachs. Finally, Hawke broke and had to look away from his piercing gaze.

She began idly toying with the spikes on his shoulder guards. "Coming with us to the coast tomorrow?" She smiled flcking the her finger back and forth across them.

Fenris turned his gaze to her playing fingers, considering her request. "If that is where you would like me to be, then yes."

"Good," she squeezed and then let go of him. "See you in the morning."

Fenris watched as she retreated into her home, then made his way to his, looking back over his shoulder periodically. Wishing, hoping that perhaps she might come running after him.

Ask him for another card lesson. Though it was a hopeless task.

Maybe an impromptu reading lesson. Which was perhaps an even more hopeless task. Though he had improved he had a long way to go yet.

When he rounded the corner into the Chantry courtyard he took one more look at her door before giving up and retreating to his lonely mansion.

As he lay in his bed facing the wall, his fingers rubbed the empty space next to him. Soon, he told himself. Soon he would be able to open up to her. Let her in. Just a little more time.

* * *

><p>Their excursion to the Wounded Coast had proved to me completely pointless. Those thugs they were supposed to find had left camp ages ago. The only good thing that came out of it was a few batches of elfroot and no more than maybe 5 silver. A complete waste. Trips to the coast were too time consuming as it was. Even without having to fight off a gang of thugs they still would have to camp for the night.<p>

After all the tents were set and a fire was going Hawke grabbed her pack and walked down to a secluded area so she could bathe in peace.

She lingered for longer than necessary. The warm water of the sea felt marvelous. Never did she ever feel more free than when she waded through the water completely nude and under the open sky.

As she returned to the camp she tossed Fenris her pack so he could use her supplies. He never brought his own and she had loaned him her own so many times it was pointless for him to start up now. Without hesitation he caught the bag and moved in the direction she had come from.

Hawke plopped herself down on a piece of driftwood and chomped on her bread, fuming again at this complete waste.

"I think he might need a little company," Isabela cooed from across the fire then jetted off in his direction.

With her mouth fallen open, barely chewed food threatening to fall at any moment Hawke stared at her retreating back. When her figure disappeared entirely she closed her mouth and resumed chewing slowly, waiting for her to come back around the corner. She waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Off in the distance she could hear the pirate cackle followed by a loud splash of water.

Hawke took a deep drink from her water jug then breathed heavily through her nostrils.

"You alright," Varric eyed her from his spot across the camp.

"I'm fine. It's fine," she responded quickly but looked off into the distance as if she was speaking only to herself. "If he wants to go swimming with Isabela I'm fine with that. It's not really any of my business. He's free to make his own choices. If a tramped up woman is what he wants, then he can have her, take her." She was leaning her elbows onto her knees, when her legs started shaking in one of her nervous twitches. "I mean he could have me, but if that's what he desires, who I am to get in his way. If he expects me to carry on as she does, I've got news for him. Not happening. You know, I'm done with this." She then very triumphantly stood to her feet.

"Done with what?" Varric asked her in concern.

Just then a fully clothed sopping wet Isabela came giggling up to the camp, with Fenris not far behind.

"Oh, come on Fenris. I only wanted a peek," she laughed. Her giggle slowly dissapated as she took in Hawke's very hostile glare. "What's wrong with you."

"Nothing. I'm going for a walk," Hawke blurted out then grabbed her daggers and wandered off into the brush of the coast trying to clear her thoughts.

Hawke roamed the winding paths for what felt like hours, periodically stopping to chop on a piece of wood with her dagger.

This pain she was feeling in the pit of her stomach just wouldn't go away. After all the waiting and hoping…

Well, why should this part of her live be any different? Nothing had ever really gone as she planned. It was mostly her fault for letting it go this far.

She stood at the edge of one of the cliffs and watched as the water banged and thrashed against the rock. She could get over this. It wasn't the end of the world. Given time, like anything else, the pain would gradually recede.

The sky was filled to the brink with sparking diamonds, the full moon casting an ethereal glow across the sea. She sighed up to the sky and realized that perhaps she should get back to camp. Hopefully everyone would have retired for evening by now and she wouldn't be pestered with questions about her abrupt departure.

As she approached the path leading to the camp she could see the orange glow from the fire peaking around the bushes. There was no talking or moving around that she could hear. Good, everyone had gone to bed. With a more determined stride she rounded the foliage eager to be done with this day.

Then there he was. The only one awake sitting on a piece of log sharpening a stick with his short blade. He glanced in her direction as she approached and stopped his action only to pat the spot next to him before returning to scraping along the wood.

Hawke felt a nervous heat rise to her cheeks, but decided that she couldn't let this bother her anymore. It was time for her to move on. She plopped down next to him, without speaking.

The two sat in silence for a moment before Fenris looked to her over his shoulder. "You've been gone for quite a while."

"Yes, I just needed to think," she answered honestly and propped her hand under her chin as she leaned forward.

He nodded and then returned to his task. The end of the stick had already reached a fierce point, but he seemed determined to slim it even more.

It was obvious to Hawke that something was troubling him. His nostrils were slightly flared, his jaw wound tight. The deep breaths he was taking told her that he was deep in thought, but unwilling to share it with her.

She thought about going to bed, leaving him to it, but couldn't bring herself to move. A part of her wanted to confront him, but the other part knew that would only make her seem like a jealous adolescent. She settled on some middle ground. What would be the harm in just casually bringing it up?

"So," she began slowly. "Isabela seems very fond of you."

"Yes," was his short answer, but he didn't look at her.

"Well, then you are lucky. She is quite a woman," there was just a small hint of sarcasm on her voice.

His peeling stopped on the wood and he looked across the fire to the pirate's tent. "I suppose most men would welcome her advances, but I am not most men."

"Really?," her interest peaked and she scooted closer to him on the log.

"Don't get me wrong. She is attractive, exotic, exciting even. But a woman like her could be found anywhere. Nearly every brothel across Thedas has at least one Isabela." He looked briefly at her then deposited his knife back in its sheath finally abandoning his sharpening. "I discovered a long time ago that I could never bring myself to accept anything she offered."

"Why is that," she couldn't help but let a small relieved smile spread across her face.

He grinned in her direction, but didn't respond, hoping she would see the meaning in it. Her smile widened and she looked away from his eyes then let them fall at the crest resting on his hip.

She remembered when he started wearing this. At first she found it odd, but then realized through his vague words and body language that it was a promise. A promise that he would never leave her side. He would follow her anywhere. A look of fondness crept into her eyes and she reached out and rubbed the insignia with her thumb.

Fenris cut his eyes to her action then turned his body towards her, extending his wrist. He rubbed his fingers along the red fabric, eyeing it, letting all the meaning behind it's soak through him. "When I make my mind up, Hawke, I am not one to deter from that path. It might take me longer to get to the goal. But I promise eventually I reach it. Some things are worth holding on to."

He finally looked up to see her smiling at him, chin still resting on her palm. "I know what you mean," she softly whispered then reached to pull a chain from around her neck.

She ran the link through her fingers before toying with the ring dangling from it. Fenris eyed the familiar piece of metal then getting curious brought his hand up to examine it.

"Where did you find this," he asked smiling, but completely at a loss.

"You left it after we…" she hesitated then encircled her hand around the red fabric at his wrist. "…You left it at my house one night."

"I see," he grinned then scooted closer to her not letting go of the chain. "I looked everywhere for it. Strange that the whole time it was only right in front of me."

"Do you want it back?" The tone of her voice told him that she hoped he didn't.

"No," he answered softly. "I would like you to keep it."

She smiled widely at him then squeezed his wrist. A pleasured hum sounded from his throat then he brought the rings to his lips kissing it lightly before tucking it back under her tunic. Hawke kissed her index finger then pressed it to his wrist, then brought it to her lips once more pressing that kiss to the crest at his waist.

Not speaking another word the two retired to their separate tents for the evening, giving each other one last smile before disappearing behind the flaps.

* * *

><p>A few nights later the two joined their friends at the Hanged Man. When she went to order drinks that same man was still lingering around the bar. As he approached Hawke, Fenris tried to keep his eyes off the exchange. Knowing finally that he had no reason for jealousy, but couldn't help himself from looking back periodically. As the man made a move to put his hand at Hawke's waist she respectfully dodged his touch and made her way back to their table.<p>

Taking the open seat next to him, Fenris smiled as she sat down watching her pull the chain from under her shirt, letting it dangle freely around her neck.

As the night went on Hawke sensed Isabela's drunkenness increasing but didn't feel that familiar sick feeling rising in her stomach. Yes, her flirtation would come. It always did, but this time she wouldn't give the pirate's words a second thought. It was finally clear to her where Fenris's heart lied.

In the back of her mind she was vaguely aware of their exchange of words. She heard his polite rejection, and then felt his arm reach around her shoulders resting on the back of her chair.

With the slightest of turns she gazed over to see the red fabric clinging to his wrist. Her heart warmed and as inconspicuously as possible she scooted her chair closer to him. She leaned into his loose embrace and felt his fingers tighten around her shoulder.

When she looked up at him with a smile, he lightly rubbed his hand up and down her arm. Hawke gripped the ring around her neck and spun it around fingers. The two shared a heartfelt stare speaking volumes about their feelings for one another without having to say a word. He knew that she would wait for him, and she knew that when the time came his heart would only be given to her. For the first time in ages, both finally understood the other.


	6. Hands

**A/N: Takes place during the dead years between Acts II and III. If you have read my other stuff it's pretty obvious I favor Hawke and Fenris being at least somewhat intimate or close during that time. For right now I don't see that changing for me. This one is FULL of silliness and fluff. Hopefully, not too silly, but it kinda got away with me. This was inspired by a single line from a book I just read, "Anna and the French Kiss." BTW if you are into heart fluttering squeals of joy this book is right up your alley. Semester just started so don't know how often I will be able to update yet. Again thanks for reading. Your reviews have all be so kind. Feedback is always appreciated!**

**Synopsis: Out on Sundermount the group decided they need something to occupy their time. **

* * *

><p>"I'm bored," Isabela moaned and spread herself dramatically out across the grass. "Let's do something fun."<p>

"Well we are all out of alcohol and I've spun my final wild tale for the day," Varric muttered.

"_You_ are out of wild tales," Hawke asked in shock from her spot on the ground. "I don't believe it." Spotting an apple in her pack she grabbed it and began tossing it up in the air continuously to occupy her own boredom.

"Well, I could read some passages from the Chant of Light," Sebastian offered.

"No!" The group answered in unison.

"I said let's do something fun. Unless that book has naughty pictures drawn on the pages, I'm not interested," Isabela rolled her eyes.

"I've got an idea," Merrill nearly shouted in excitement.

"Let's be clear," Anders eyed her warily. "Just because I let you put ribbons in my hair one night when I was drunk that doesn't mean I'll let you do it again. No matter how pretty I looked."

Hawke's apple went tumbling out of her hands as she giggled. "You did look terribly pretty, Anders. It's such a shame you only limit yourself to one ponytail."

"Ha ha," he scowled at her. "You are so funny."

"Oh I wasn't talking about that," Merrill waved her hand at him. "Though it was delightful and you did look splendid. But let's play a game!"

"What sort of game," Aveline sighed from across the camp. "Varric forgot his cards."

"Well now that you mention it, I don't really know any games. Well any games for humans. All the ones I know are Dalish and far too confusing to teach. Oh, never mind," she sighed and propped her head against her chin.

"I know a game," Hawke sat up from the ground. "It's one we used to play in Lothering. Granted we were children and it is a bit juvenile."

"Oh anything is better than just sitting here," Isabela again dramatically threw herself on the ground.

"Alright, then" she stood to her feet and gestured for Aveline to come to her. "It's called Red Mabari." She gripped her hand tightly in Aveline's and took an aggressive stance, forming a tight line with their arms. "The object is for your opponent to come charging at your arms as fast and as hard as they can. You have to hold your partners hand tightly to keep them from breaking through."

"Yes, I know this game." Aveline nodded. "I've seen children play it often. If they break through one of your team mates has to go to the other side. But if they don't they will join your team."

"Yes that's right," Hawke answered excitedly. "Once everyone from your opponent's team has been joined with yours the game is through." She tossed her hands enthusiastically in the air forgetting that she was talking to grown adults for the moment.

Everyone looked at her with blank stares, which made her terribly uncomfortable. "Well, you aren't supposed to try to hurt the other people. It's just you know for fun." When no one responded again she threw herself down onto the ground in defeat.

"I'm team captain," Aveline spoke quickly.

"What! Why do you get to be team captain?" Isabela finally got up from the ground and propped her hands at her hips.

"Because I know the game _and _I'm Captain of the Guard," she snootily replied and crossed her arms across her chests.

"Well, I'm the Captain of a ship. So that makes me team Captain, too."

"Now, now. If anybody should be team captain it's, Hawke," Varric chimed in.

"I agree. It should be Aveline and Hawke. Both are already familiar with the game," Sebastian rose from his log to join the discussion.

"Oh fine," Isabela conceded. "But I get to be team captain next time."

Hawke smiled to herself and joined Aveline in front of the anxious group. It made her insides swarm with joy as the looks of eagerness and excitement spread across their faces. Well, all except Fenris. He remained sitting by himself on a rock ignoring the events.

He was definitely in one of his moods lately. No doubt because her visits to his mansion had slowly died off. It wasn't her fault, well not really. His reading had improved to a level of not needing her assistance anymore and Kirkwall had her running all over the place to solve their petty disputes. Hopefully, this little bit of fun would get him out of his funk.

She and Aveline flipped a coin to see who got to choose first. Luckily, it had been her and as everyone eyed her anxiously she scanned the crowd as if pondering who she would choose.

"Fenris," she finally shouted out. "I choose Fenris."

"I'm not playing," he answered dryly.

"But you have to. We don't have even players," she put on her best puppy dog eyes as she walked over to him. As he looked up she saw the faintest look of consideration before he rolled his eyes and turned away. "Please," she spoke lowly and offered her hand to him. The sigh and shrug of his shoulders told her that he just needed a little more persuasion. Putting all her womanly skills to work she moved to stand in front of him and placed her hands on his shoulders. "Please, Fenris. It would make me so happy."

"Fine," he begrudgingly gave in and stood to his feet.

"Yay!" She yelled and wrapped her arms around his neck. "But you have to take off your gauntlets. Those things could really hurt someone."

"Fine," he repeated with a sigh and began unstrapping them.

Aveline picked Sebastian. Followed by Hawke picking Isabela. Then Anders, Varric, and Merrill, respectively.

Across the field they locked their hands together, staring each other down. This was turning out to be a fierce competition. "Ok, rules," Hawke shouted. "No magic, no stealth, and please don't try to hurt anyone. We're low on elfroot as it is. Oh, and no lyrium ghost," she cut her eyes to Fenris with a smile.

Since she was the seasoned player, it was decided that Hawke's team be allowed to go first. She gathered her teammates around her to strategize. "Ok, who do we want to call over?"

Fenris looked over his shoulder and analyzed the competition. "Merrill is quite clearly their weakest player."

"Alright, everyone agrees on Merrill," she looked around for clarification. When all heads nodded, they took their stance. Even though she was ten years older than the last time she played this silly game her heart was racing with excitement. Though she wasn't exactly sure if it was the prospect of the game or just being able to hold Fenris's hand. She squeezed her fingers around his and looked over to him, when he squeezed back and gently smiled, her pulse began to quicken. Yep, it was Fenris.

"When you want to call someone over you have to say it like this…" A blush began building on her cheeks at how ridiculous she was about to sound, but couldn't deny that this was actually kind of fun. "Red Mabari, Red Mabari…Send Merrill over to party!"

"Oh that's me," she gasped.

"Yes, now run over there with all your might and break their chain," Aveline shouted.

Merrill took a running stance then jetted out from her line. Clearly not understanding the point of the game she ran straight for their strongest link. Hawke and Fenris.

The two stretched their arms out and gripped tightly to one another hands as Merrill approached. She let out a silly squeal just as she was about to hit and came crashing against the strength of their arms with an 'oof.'

Merrill joined their group while the other team began their own strategizing. "Isabela," Aveline called. "We want Isabela."

"But you didn't say the silly chant," the pirate pouted. "I'm not coming unless you say it."

The group all rolled their eyes and very dryly called for her. "Red Mabari, Red Mabari…Send Isabela over to party."

She giggled with delight and began running over to them. Clearly not going to get a hit anywhere she landed, with Aveline in the middle, she chose the side with Sebastian and was met with a great defeat. The top of her body went toppling over their arms with her skirt flying up to give everyone a decent view of her backside.

"Oh bugger," she sighed. "Sorry!" Then she took her place on her new team.

The four gathered around again to discuss their next choice. After some deliberation they decided that Anders would be the best and called him over.

Surprisingly, the mage was quite fierce with his run and easily broke through the weakest part of their chain at Hawke and Varric. It was quite difficult to maintain a strong grip with someone so much shorter. Aveline then forced him to get Merrill back since she was a part of their team to begin with, which he reluctantly did.

Now with just the three of them they couldn't really stand to lose another player. But when Aveline's team called for Varric, it was quite clear that they would be losing him too. His stumpy legs didn't really make him move fast enough so his hit to their arms barely even registered. He fell back to the ground with a thud, and a slew of dwarven curses.

Hawke turned into Fenris her last remaining team mate to discuss their next choice, but was quickly distracted by the nearness of their bodies and the feel of his thumb rubbing against the back of her hand. Was he even aware he was doing that?

He was speaking she was sure he was, but all she could focus on was his beautiful lips moving and the deep purr of his sultry voice. Their hands went more lax the longer he spoke and she moved her thumb to his palm. On its own accord her nail began tracing circles against the underside of his hand. There was a smile creeping across her face, she could feel it, but was powerless to control it. When his thumb picked up rubbing against hers, she sighed in her moment of bliss. They should hold hands more often, she thought. Why couldn't friends hold hands?

"Hawke, are you even listening to me," Fenris looked down to her with a sigh.

"Huh….I mean what was that," she blinked rapidly. "I'm sorry I was distracted."

He grinned and stepped closer to her. "I said do you think that is a good idea?"

"Yeah, sure. Whatever you want to do," she stuttered out and the cleared her throat as they stretched their arms out. Fenris looked over to her waiting for her to speak the silly chant. Feeling embarrassed at not knowing who he wanted to call she shrugged her shoulders and waved her hand for him to do it.

He released a sigh of frustration but reluctantly spoke the words to call over Aveline.

Wait. Aveline? Did she hear that right?

Before she had time to protest the warrior came charging out towards them with a fierce growl. Hawke tensed her arm and turned away preparing herself for the blow Aveline was about to cause them.

As the guard Captain approached Hawke felt Fenris grip tightly to her and bury his feet into the ground, but they were no match for Aveline's strength. Only facing a little resistance she bursts through them. Hawke grimaced and cradled her hand to her chest. Both the intense hold of Fenris and Aveline's strength had done quite a number to it.

"Fenris you're with us. Looks like it's just you Hawke," Aveline threw a premature victorious grin at her before retreating to the other side.

This was it. Only she could keep the game going. She eyed the line across from her. They made a pretty intimidating chain. Anywhere she chose to run would be difficult to break through.

Fenris gave his best mischievous grin hoping she would see the intent behind it. When she smiled back and came charging towards his spot in the chain, he pretended to brace himself for her impact. With Aveline as his partner he had to time this perfectly if he wanted to ensure that their foul play wasn't detected.

As her body hit their arms he gripped Aveline's hand tightly then let his fingers go lax so she could pass through with ease, and hopefully without notice.

She dramatically tumbled past them to exaggerate her effort then bounced up in the air wearing a huge smile. "Yes! I did it," she repeated over and over then ran to Fenris and jumped in his arms.

"I'm on to you two," Aveline scowled as he spun around in the air.

Fenris faked an innocent look of hurt as he peered at her over Hawke's body. "I don't know what you mean."

Anders chuckled with his disbelief. "Yeah, yeah. I can only imagine who she is going to bring back over with her."

Still hoisted up in his arms Hawke tapped her chin as if thinking, then looked back down to him with a large smile. "I choose Fenris," she leaned in and brushed her nose against his before letting herself out of his arms.

Warmth spread from his torso and across his body as Hawke took her hand in his and led them back across the field. If he was being honest with himself he rather enjoyed her game. More so he enjoyed the normalcy she was showing him. For weeks he had sensed the distance growing between them. Each time he sought her out Bodahn told him she was busy, and her visits to his mansion were nearly non-existent. Granted she really didn't have a reason to come to him anymore, but her constant presence had been welcomed and was now something that he was finding he greatly missed. Even if he was reluctant to admit it.

He felt her fingers rake themselves between his own and his nerves began to tingle. Too long it had been since they had allowed themselves to indulge in physical contact. This was nice. They should hold hands more often, but he doubted he would be able to do so openly. And it wouldn't be fair to only show her affection within the confines of their homes. He let out an audible sigh at his own cowardice. When he looked back to Hawke she was beaming at him.

"We make quite a team, you cheater…" she whispered.

"I don't see you complaining. Without my help you would have suffered a great defeat."

Her free hand wrapped around their joined ones as she brought the back of his knuckles to her lips and kissed them lightly. "I know," she smiled. "Always my savior, aren't you." Fenris felt the fire ignite in his stomach as she rubbed his hand against her cheek.

"Oh get on with," Isabela yelled. "You're starting to make me ill."

"We can take them," he leaned into her with a grin.

"I know we can," she smiled genuinely.

Sure enough, with a renewed force they gradually took down their opponents one by one, until Varric was the last one standing. Granted they had lost a few back and forth but were able to make it up as the game progressed.

Despite, knowing full well that he was most likely wouldn't be able to break through, Varric gave a valiant effort. And despite the teasing he received from his height he took it all in stride.

With the sun falling below the tree line, the game was abandoned. Everyone made their way back to the camp, except for Fenris and Hawke. They stood awkwardly together still holding hands.

The game was through he should let go. Why wasn't he letting go? Perhaps he should say something.

Both started to speak at the same time then laughed nervously. "You go first," they said in unison. "No, you."

Fenris sighed with a smile and gestured with his hand for her to speak. "Umm…" Hawke started and began swaying their joined hands back and forth. "I found something I want to show you," she grinned nervously and pushed her hair behind her ear not looking him in the eyes. Fenris couldn't suppress the grin that was building on his face as he took in her sudden bashfulness. "If you are interested that is," she added quickly. He quirked his eyebrow in curiosity then nodded a yes to her.

A full smile of happiness spread across her face as she began leading them away from the camp. Still gripping her hand he followed her through the tree line and up a hill. This was definitely peaking his interest. A million thoughts began swarming through his mind at where she could be taking him and million more on what they would do when they arrived.

Abruptly she turned an about face on him, stopping him in his tracks. "Close your eyes," she playfully commanded. His eyebrows quirked up in confusion. "So stubborn," she teased and gently placed a finger to each of his eyelids.

Her other hand intertwined with his and he felt her begin to move him forward. Catching a rock with his toe he stumbled a bit. "Careful, watch your step."

"This would be easier if you allowed me my eyesight," he tried to sound annoyed.

"Oh where's the fun in that. Trust me it will be worth it."

He felt their movements stop and her body move closer to his. On impulse he took a deep breath and was instantly filled with the aroma of her. The soap she used, her armor, the smell of her home, then that sweet inviting smell that seemed to always linger on her skin, no matter if she had just finished fighting thugs or napping.

"Ok," she whispered so close that he could feel her breath against his skin. "You can open your eyes."

Slowly he raised his eyelids. The only thing he saw was his beautiful Hawke beaming up at him, excitement and joy written all over his face. When she bit her lip and looked at him expectantly clearly waiting for a reaction, he cleared his throat and looked to his surroundings.

The two stood in a vast meadow at the base of Sundermount. Rolling hills and wildflowers covered the horizon. With the sun still barely out a faint orange glow encompassed the field.

"So," he felt her tug his arm. "What do you think?"

"It's wonderful, Hawke," he smiled back and brushed her loose strands of hair behind her ear.

Never once letting go of his hand she led him out to the middle of the field and sat down on one of the small hills pulling him down to join her. "Isn't it amazing," she sighed in bliss and laid her back flat against the ground.

He had to admit it was one of the more beautiful places he had seen in Kirkwall. It was sometimes hard to remember that despite all the fighting and messes they got themselves into there was still always time to just sit back and enjoy what nature gave you. This was a lesson she often tried to teach him. In an attempt to let himself feel free for the moment he stretched his body out beside hers.

"Doesn't that cloud look like a bunny," she pointed to the sky with their joined hands.

Fenris followed her pointing finger and studied the white puff. It certainly did have two long protruding parts that could resemble ears. The nice round cloud below it could possibly be taking for a head. "I suppose it could be a _bunny_."

"Well what do you think it looks like," she giggled as she leaned up on her elbow.

Fenris studied the cloud trying to see if he could see anything in the puffs and small changes of colors. "I guess I see…a bunny."

An amused sigh escaped her lips as she released his hand to prop her head against her palm. With his hand now free of hers, he felt an increased longing at the absence of it. Hawke was busy studying the sky for more formations, but all Fenris could do was eye her free hand that rested against her hip. It wouldn't be much for him to just reach up and grab it. After all she they had been holding hands nearly all day. His fingers itched to feel hers against them again. Just as he was about to reach up and touch her fingers she moved to point at a cloud across from him.

"What about that one? What do you see?"

He turned towards the direction of her finger and just saw a bunch of white puffs, nothing really in particular. "Why don't you tell me what you see?" He propped his hand behind his head in a hope to quell his desire to reach out for her.

"Oh, no. I asked you first."

"To tell you the truth, Hawke. I don't see anything," he answered honestly with a sigh.

"Really?"

"Really," he nearly laughed. Finding shapes among the clouds hadn't been a pastime he actively participated in.

He felt her scoot closer to him on the ground. Her arm reached across his body and pointed off into the horizon. "See that little one between the two great big ones?"

He nodded his head.

"Now try really hard to see something other than just a white poof and tell me what it is," she smiled that intoxicating smile that could get him to do literally anything. He wondered if she knew how much power she held over him with such a simple gesture. In an attempt to placate her he looked towards the cloud and focused intently on seeing something other than just what it was.

After moments of failing miserably he felt her hand gently drop against his chest. When the deep swell of longing spread throughout him, he couldn't resist placing his own atop it. His fingers began idly tracing their way up and down each of hers, counting the knuckles as he passed them. Then he saw it.

"It's a heart." His voice was shocked at the fact that he was able to see anything at all.

"That's right," he heard her smile before he actually saw it.

When he looked back towards her she grinning widely back at him. He took a moment to just look at her. Analyze all her features that he had taken for granted for so long. Study the smooth lines of her face, the shining reflections of her eyes that he could get lost in for days, that deep soothing smile that she reserved only for him. Never had he ever seen her smile like that to anyone else.

When a light breeze picked up and blew some excess flowers through the air, one slowly landed just above her ear. Fenris smiled and leaned up to remove the small pink flower, but when it had been discarded he found himself captivated by the smooth silk of her hair. Without giving himself time to think better of it, Fenris ran his hands through her hair and tucked it behind her ear, brushing the back of his knuckles across her jaw as he retreated. Her lips parts slightly and she leaned into him. A swarm of knots and nerves jumbled around in his stomach as he brushed his fingers back across her jaw before cradling her cheek and pulling her face to him.

Just as their lips were about to touch Aveline was calling to them from beyond the tree line. He tried to ignore it, but when she yelled again a little louder he threw his head back in frustration.

Hawke sighed and got up from the ground, brushing her body off. He soon joined her and followed to the captain's voice.

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><p>All night long he was captivated by her hands. Never before had he noticed how soft and smooth they were, especially for someone who used them as hard as she did. Each finger was long and delicate, it was a miracle she could wield weapons the way she did.<p>

With each of her movements he followed them. From picking up her pack, to kindling the fire, brushing dirt off her knee. He was enamored with them.

The next day proved to be just as difficult to focus on anything else. The way they swayed with the timing of her walk. How she rubbed them together when she was pondering something. Their quick nimble movements as she readjusted the buckles on her armor.

He was quickly losing himself. The desire to reach out and touch her hand was becoming harder and harder to bury.

When they reached Hightown he was grateful for the reprieve he would receive when they went their separate ways. But as she stopped at a weapons stall to examine the new daggers, instead of moving on and giving her his farewell he lingered with her, all the while captivated by her hands.

He watched intently as she reached of a dagger and ran her fingers delicately across the blade. A deep longing to feel that against his own skin surged in him. Hesitantly, he reached out and grabbed for her hand. The way he awkwardly wrapped his fingers tightly around hers just didn't fit. He tried to pull it towards him and make it right, but that confused look she was giving him caused him to lose his boldness.

"Fenris? Is something wrong?" No this was a mistake he shouldn't have done that. Now he could see the apprehension on her face. Yesterday must have been a fluke.

"Forgive me," he spoke deeply and turned away from her, not wanting her to see the embarrassment lingering on his face.

Thankfully, she immediately abandoned her inspection of the new weapons and began walking towards her mansion. As he took up walking behind her, she slowed her steps until they were side by side.

Just as they were ascending the steps out of the market he felt her index finger nudge against his. For a moment his breath stopped and then he felt her snake her fingers in between his own. He let out a shaky breath and looked to see her smiling to herself. Determined not to let her know how easy this simple gesture affected him he squeezed her hand in his and ran his thumb against her own.

When they reached the door to her mansion the two stood in silence, her leaned up against the threshold, and he with his arm propped above her head, with their joined hands floating between their bodies. Both of them couldn't tear their eyes away from the union. For what felt like ages they let their hands tell the other exactly what their heart felt, even if neither one was willing to utter the words.

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><p><strong>Ten imaginary points to whoever can guess what game "Red Mabari" is based off of. But if you grew up where I did I can't imagine it would be too difficult. Hope I was clear on the explanation of the game. <strong>


	7. Comfort

**A/N: I think like a lot of people I was a little unsatisfied with the Fenris comfort after All That Remains, but I guess it was true to his character. This is kind of my take on how he would comfort her, but it is set much after that quest. With the complete and utter silliness of the last chapter hopefully this will balance that out. This is kind of sad so heads up. Thanks to all who have reviewed, read, faved my story. I really appreciate how nice all of you have been. (Dieb, GamerChic, and T.I.M. -thanks for your encouraging words!)**

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><p>It had been exactly one year since the horrible day that Hawke lost her mother. Upon awakening, Fenris set out to her mansion, knowing that she would not want to be alone today of all days. On his walk he thought back to that time. When it happened he was so unsure of what to say or how to comfort her. Having no memory of his family it was difficult for him to relate to her pain, but he never left her side. For weeks he stayed with her, sleeping on her couch or the arm chair in her room. Each night she would wake up and seek him out.<p>

She never cried or spoke about her feelings, but would curl up in his arms and cling to him while he tried his best to soothe her. A part of him thought that perhaps he would never leave, but gradually she stopped coming to him, until eventually she started sleeping through the night on her own.

He would never forget the pain he felt when he realized she didn't need him anymore, but he was also grateful. It meant the sorrow was beginning to heal. Over the months that followed, she gradually reawakened to her normal self and didn't have the ghost of pain behind her eyes. He still remembered the first time he saw her laugh. Some ridiculous thing Varric said caused her face to light up with joy, and he knew then that things would get better.

But over the last week something had been off about her demeanor. She was cold to him, to everyone really. Any time he saw her there was a hint of anger in her voice and lingering behind her eyes. During their last reading lesson he knew she wasn't paying attention. Her hard gaze was fixed on his fireplace, lost in some memory. Purposefully, he stumbled upon some of the words hoping to bring her back to him, but she never noticed and continued to periodically offer him monotone praise.

She was hurting and he had no idea what to say or do. He hoped that again maybe just his presence would offer her some peace. If nothing else he could sit with her offering the little comfort he could give through the agony of the day.

When he approached her home he didn't bother to knock and let himself in, hoping to surprise her. But then he heard raised voices from the library. He strained to recognize them as he made his way into the main room and saw Bodahn in the corner. He motioned to the door of the library and went back to his duties.

"Hawke, I am only trying to help. It is obvious that something is bothering you." Sebastian's voice was clearly recognizable as he approached.

"I'm fine," she spat back at him. "If I wanted your help I would have come to you."

"Losing a loved one is never an easy thing." When Fenris rounded the corner he saw Sebastian warily approach her and place a hand to her shoulder. "You needn't carry the weight of this alone."

Hawke jerked away from him and paced to the other side of the room. "I said I am fine. Now please leave."

He sighed and made his way towards the door, noticing Fenris but walked past him without a word.

Fenris stood in silence at the threshold of the library unsure if it would be wise for him to enter. If she wanted solitude perhaps he should allow her to have it. But another part of him knew all to well how one bottles their emotions and pushes them aside; trying desperately not to feel the pain in their heart.

Hawke sighed loudly in aggravation then swept her hand across the table she was leaning on, sending all its contents crashing to the floor. Abruptly she turned around with a sneer on her face, but softened at the sight of him. "Fenris, I didn't know you were here."

"I arrived just a moment ago," he finally moved into the room, slowly and unsure of what the proper words would be. "I thought that maybe you might want some company."

Immediately the softness of her features hardened. "Not you, too. Look, everyone else has already made their appearances. I'm fine and neither want nor need to be coddled."  
>Normally, he would have taken that as his cue to leave, but knew that she didn't actually want to be alone. She was putting a wall up and he would let her, but he wouldn't leave. Instead, he slowly moved into the room and placed a hand to her shoulder. "I'm not here to coddle you, Hawke."<p>

The tension in her shoulders relaxed and she looked away from him. "None of this is fair."

He knew she was right, but most things rarely were. Hawke of all people deserved happiness, yet her life had been clouded with misery and pain. Everyone she loved had been taken from her. No matter how much good she tried to do, fate seemed determined to make her suffer. Cursing himself inwardly he knew he had no kind words to say, no profound statement to bring the happiness back to her. In his silence Hawke looked up to him and he could see the pain on her face. She winced and shrugged his hand off her.  
>"Look at this," she gestured to her mansion with her hands. "It was all for nothing. Everything I have fought for, things that were supposed to bring my family together, all it's done is slowly destroy us. I failed them." The beginnings of tears were flashing in her eyes and she turned away from him. "I failed father."<p>

She was anything but a failure. The care and love she gave everyone around her, always putting herself last. Hawke was the most incredible woman he had ever met. If there was a Maker how could he allow so many horrible things to happen to her?

"I promised father that I would take care of them," her voice shook. And although he couldn't see her face he knew the painful tears had finally broken through. "Carver…I couldn't save Carver. Now the remains of his body lay mangled and broken all alone. She blamed me for it. I know she did. Every time she looked at me, I could see the accusation in her eyes. 'Why didn't you protect him?' 'How could you let this happen to him?' It wasn't my fault Fenris," she choked on her words. Gradually he made his way to her side in case she needed to reach out to him. "She resented me for not mourning him like she did, but I couldn't. I had to be strong. Someone had to be. If I took a moment to feel the pain in my heart..."

"You have nothing to be ashamed of, Hawke." He gradually reached out for her hand.

After a moment of struggle, she released the tension and let him intertwine their fingers. Placing a hand to his stomach, she turned into him with her eyes downcast. "But what of Bethany? I killed her."

"Hawke, no you didn't," he tried to reassure her and brought their interlaced fingers to his chest. For a moment he thought she was going to give in to him and hear his words. Her face contorted in pain and she squeezed his hand, but then abruptly pushed off of him.

"All she wanted me to do was keep her safe. And I didn't! I didn't protect her, and I didn't protect Carver. I let them down. Maker Fenris, Bethany's dying words were 'watch over mother.' And what did I do? I became so engrossed in my own life and problems that I didn't even see what was going on in front of me. I could have saved her. I should have saved her!"

"What good has come from anything I've done!" The rage and anger in her voice were growing as she paced back and forth across the room. He followed her movements then walked to shut the door in order to give them some privacy. No one should see her this upset. "Yeah, great I restored the Amell name and bought back our family home. I became the Champion of Kirkwall. Who gives a shit about any of that! When I'm gone no one will even know. Some unknown person will take this home, the Hawke name will die with me. What good was any of this! Everything I've done was for them, and now I'm all alone!" In a rage she grabbed the contents of the desk near her door and chucked them into the fire.

A piece of parchment drifted through the flames but fell out on to the floor, the edges burning. Fenris paced to the hearth and stomped the flame out and then bent down to look at the words.

Even though he was still learning and struggling with even the most basic sentences the heartfelt message was clear. He heard Hawke stir from across the room and walk over to him. When she saw the paper in his hand she knelt down beside him. As the words of her mother sank in, the wall of her emotions came crumbling down and she curled her legs under body and began to sob.

Fenris attempted to wipe the tears from her eyes, but they were coming too quickly. "She was proud of you, Hawke. You were never a failure."

"I just feel so alone," she managed through her sobs.

"You are not alone," he gave her heartfelt smile and brushed her hair away from her face.

Hawke rolled her eyes. "I know, I know. I have tons of people around me all the time. Friends and people who care about me. But I know that eventually they will all leave. Even you." The pain in her eyes caused Fenris's heart to break, he wanted to tell her that wasn't the case, but he knew it could be a lie. "If Danarius makes himself known, you will go to him. And I don't blame you for it. He deserves whatever death you bring to him. But each day I feel it getting closer and closer. Soon you will be gone, too."

She buried her head in her hands trying to muffle the sounds of her cries. He had no idea how much she needed him. If she only knew how much he needed her, too. Leaving her side was not an option for him right now, but there was truth in her words. Danarius would come for him eventually.

The sounds of her cries gradually subsided and she wiped the back of her hand across her face, then smiled weakly at him. "I'm sorry to burden you with all this. You have enough of your own troubles. I'm just so scared of losing you along with everything else."

The tears threatened to come back as she reached for his face. Fenris leaned into her touch then cradled her in his arms, squeezing her to his chest. She fully gave herself to his embrace and let him lift her off the ground. Still cradling her to him he walked to her arm chair and sat down with her in his lap, pulling her into his chest. His head rested atop hers as the sounds of her sniffles gradually died down. "I do not know what the future holds, Hawke, but I remain at your side."

She nodded against his chest and relaxed into him. The two continued to sit in silence as the sound of the crackling fire engulfed the room. It wasn't until the soothing caresses against his chest ceased that he realized she had fallen asleep. Fenris arched his head to peep down at her sleeping form and felt that heated tingle deep in his chest. Certain that she was indeed asleep he kissed the top of her head and whispered. "I will never leave you, Hawke."

"Thank you, Fenris," she softly spoke and placed a gentle kiss to his neck.

Unable to hide his true feelings, he pulled her closer to him as he pressed his lips against her forehead. Scrunching his eyes he breathed her in and knew that he truly would never be able to leave. A part of him would be forever tied to her. No matter what happened in their lives, he would always come back to her, back to this. Hawke belonged in his arms.

After he relaxed he began softly caressing her arm and shoulder as the two gradually drifted off to sleep while holding on to each other. Both were powerless to fight against the need for one another. And one day when the pressures of their lives ceased they wouldn't have to.

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><p><strong>I know a little sad, but hopefully there was enough sweetness at the end. I always felt so incredibly bad for Hawke. Especially, if your sibling dies in the Deep Roads. So much crap continuously happens to her. I wouldn't blame her for having a mini breakdown.<strong>


	8. Under the Blanket

**A/N: I wrapped them in a blanket for you T.I.M, LOL**

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><p>Fenris awoke to what felt like ice brushing up against his feet. Sleepily, he moved them away from the source only to have it follow them. Grumbling he rolled over and pulled the thick blanket over his body. A soft whimper sounded over his shoulder then he felt her gentle arms wrap around his torso and pull closer to him. Slowly he opened his eyes and looked down to see Hawke's hand curled up against his chest. Her ice cold feet brushed up against his again causing him to flinch. Why would she insist on not wearing socks in a temperature like this? He was used to it, but she must be freezing. Nuzzling her head against his back, she mumbled something in her sleep and then rolled off of him.<p>

Fenris turned over to look at her and noticed her shirt was slightly bunched up on her side. Chill bumps had already begun to set into her skin. Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he stifled a yawn and sat up. Hawke mumbled again and reached her hand behind her body lazily swatting at the air. When she finally caught his arm, she grabbed him and started pulling him back towards her. Fenris chuckled deep in his throat and rolled over her body to place a soft kiss to her cheek. She sighed in contentment and he was sure he saw her lip curl up slightly, before she relaxed and went back to her deep sleep. As he got up he made sure her entire body was completely covered by the thick blanket before putting his clothes on. The rest of the camp must still be asleep. He hadn't heard anyone up and about; the cold must be keeping them in their tents.

He hated Sundermount this time of year. Though it rarely snowed this far down, the icy winds tunneled down the mountain. Merrill better be thanking Hawke profusely for agreeing to accompany her here. Taking one last look at his sleeping beauty he stepped out of the tent to make a fire before the others awoke.

The crisp air immediately made him shiver. Though he was used to harsh conditions, it didn't make it any easier. The only reason he agreed to come at all was because he didn't trust anyone but himself to properly take care of Hawke. He knew she was perfectly capable of handling herself, but he had a deep instinctive desire to keep her safe. Gladly, he would do anything to keep her comfortable and protected, even if that meant dealing with blood mages, trudging through snow, sleeping in the cold, or waking up before dawn to ensure a fire was made when she awakened.

After he collected the wood and got a sufficient blaze going he sat down on a nearby log and let the heat bring feeling back to his limbs.

He heard Hawke stirring in their tent, cursing and mumbling the entire time she got dressed. When she finally burst through the flap her hair was still disheveled and she was wearing an angry pout. "I hate Sundermount," she huffed and walked towards the fire. "It's freezing out here."

Fenris watched as she wrapped her arms around herself and rubbed up and down the length of them, clearly agitated at the weather.

On impulse he stood from his log and walked back into their tent to retrieve their blanket. Hawke smiled as he came up behind her and draped the thick fabric over her shoulders. "That should keep you warm," he patted her shoulders then went to tend the fire. He felt her eyes on him as he moved to sit back down. Looking a little more comfortable she walked towards him. Expecting her to sit on the log next to him he was a little taken back when she draped the blanket around the front of her body and plopped down on the ground directly in front of him. She reached behind her and tugged on his hand, signifying that she wanted him to join her. Unable to suppress a grin he did as she desired and sat down behind her letting her fall back against his chest.

It was still so strange. For years he silently begged and wished for this, and now that she freely gave him all the adoration and affection he desired he was still always surprised when he received it.

Once his hands were under the blanket her own found his instantly. "Hawke you're freezing," he pulled her closer to him and surrounded one of her icy hands between both of his. Tenderly he began rubbing warmth back into it.

"Coming from the man who doesn't wear shoes," she chuckled. "How are you able to stand it?"

His fingers ran up and down hers until satisfied that they were warm then he reached for her other hand to repeat the task. "It takes some practice, but eventually you are able to separate yourself from the pain."

He felt her tense at his words and knew that she was imagining him as a slave. Her fingers curled around his and she brought their hands to her chest and pushed them against her heart. Instead of saying 'I'm sorry' or 'how could they do all those things to you' she brought his fingers to her mouth and kissed each one before returning them under the blanket. He was grateful.

It always irked him beyond belief when people felt pity for him. Even if she did, he would never know. Hawke had this way of comforting him about his past without making him feel like she felt sorry for him. A soft smile crept its way along his mouth then he brushed his face alongside hers before letting it rest there.

Still obviously a little cold, Hawke shivered and pulled his arms around her. The sun still hadn't risen yet, and although it wouldn't provide much heat from these temperatures it would definitely make it more bearable. In an attempt to warm her some more he ran his hands up and down the length of her arms, trying to create friction. Gradually her shivers subsided and she relaxed against him. Fenris closed his eyes and breathed her in as he ran his hands across her flat stomach. Nothing he had ever done in his life was worthy of her, and yet she didn't care. Every part of him that was broken and shattered she had picked up and pieced back together. This woman nestled against his chest in the freezing temperatures of Sundermount had looked past the bitter slave and seen a man. A man worthy of her desire and her heart. He would never make her regret that decision ever again.

"Are you still cold," he whispered against her cheek.

"I have to admit I'm definitely better with you wrapped around me. But I guess my legs are still just a _little_ cold."

"Here." He gripped her hips and pulled her closer to him then pulled her legs to lay criss-cross between his own. With complete innocence he rubbed his hands up and down the length of her thighs slowly. When he reached the junction of her hip the second time, Hawke shuddered and arched her back, pushing her backside into his pelvis.

Fenris fought back the urge to run his fingers across her core. Now was not the time or place for impromptu love making even if he was suddenly aching with a heated desire for her. Trying to sate at least a little of his need to touch her, he let his hands slide across the top of her thighs then he squeezed. Hawke sighed in pleasure and tilted her back to look at him, a sly smile spreading across her features. "I know one way you could warm me up."

Fenris chuckled and moved his mouth to her ear. "As soon as we get back to Kirkwall I am all yours, Hawke." Seeing the pout on her face made his smile widened and he kissed her cheek.

"Fine," she sighed. "I suppose the floor of our tent would be incredibly cold against my backside."

With the sun just beginning to peer over the horizon, Hawke nuzzled back against his chest and wrapped his arms around her torso. He pulled her close to him and felt an enormous wave of contentment pass through him. There had been countless nights he'd slept on the cold ground and shivering through his sleep. Many mornings when he had been up early enough to see the sun rise, but none as perfect as this one.

"Fenris."

He hummed his acknowledgement then brushed his face against hers.

"Do you think we should wake the others?"

"No, let me hold you for a while longer," he softly answered.

Hawke turned towards him with a wide smile. Removing her hand from the warmth of the blanket she brought it up to his neck and pulled his lips towards hers, kissing him slowly. The sensation of her lips against his own never failed to ignite a fire within him. The longer she kissed him it only continued to grow in intensity. When her tongue brushed against his in that perfect way that only she was capable of, Fenris let out a ragged breath and squeezed his eyes tight as he savored the taste of her mouth.

As their kiss slowly died down he placed his forehead against hers. "You could hold me forever and it would never be long enough, Fenris," she whispered against his mouth.

He knew she was right, and if he had anything to say about he would hold her every chance he got from here until the end of his days.

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><p><strong>I know…super short. So I am sorry. But this just kind of happened on its own, wasn't really planning on it. Next one will definitely be longer. I promise. <strong>


	9. Coming Home

**A/N: Sorry for the long delay. Between starting this semester, work, and a new book series that I just got into things have been pretty hectic. This one is set right before the end of the game. In one of the codex entries it says that Fenris took on some mercenary work. So that is what I based this one on. Warning-some sexy time. Thanks again to everyone who has reviewed. I try to respond to all of them, but not everyone has PM enabled. So just know that I thank you deeply for reading my stories. **

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><p>The light ocean breeze blew through Fenris's hair. Despite the pleasant feeling the horrid smell of fish filled the air, making him want to gag. He couldn't get off this retched boat fast enough. This was it. No more mercenary jobs. Although Hawke had never pressured him to stop seeking outside work, spending this time apart from her was beginning to become agonizing.<p>

After all he didn't really need the work. Her income was more than enough to sustain them, and she was always more than willing to cut all of her companions a fair share. Still it had felt nice to know that he didn't _have _to depend on her.

But this whole trip had been a waste. His mind was completely unfocused the entire time. All he could think about was her face. Their conversation from the morning he left sprang forth in his mind as he approached the docks.

She had come to him in the early morning hours just before the ship was leaving. It was clear she didn't want him to go, but she would never tell him. She knew how important it was for him to feel independent.

With tear glazed eyes she stopped him at his door and pulled him to her, savoring the last few moments with him. "_How long will you be gone," _her voice sounded muffled against his chest.

He was still so unprepared for her affection. It was the oddest feeling to know that she cared so much for him. Wanting to show her that he cared as well, he dropped his pack along with his sword and cradled her to him. _"Only a few weeks,_" he answered as he ran his hand up and down her spine to soothe her.

"_That feels like ages away." _Holding him tightly to her she hooked her arms over his shoulders and pressed her lips to his neck.

A rush of warmth spread through him as he realized how much his absence would affect her. Countless times he had left and she had been fine with it. But now, with the turmoil of the city clashing around them she needed him. He knew she always felt stronger when he was at her side. She had never wanted the responsibility Kirkwall placed on her, but she accepted and tried to meet their expectations.

They asked too much of her and it angered him. No one else had to see her pacing her fireplace into the early hours of the morning. Or blaming herself when impossible situations didn't go as planned. It was too much and he would be glad when they left this city and all its corruption behind. But that would be her choice. As long as she wanted to stay he would be at her side.

Fenris squeezed her tightly to his chest and kissed the top of her head. _"I will be back as soon as I can."_

He knew it didn't make her feel better, but she released him and offered a small smile before she kissed him lightly and bid him goodbye before her true emotions fell.

That look on her face was burned into his mind the entire trip. Tears that wouldn't quite fall in his presence, but he was sure had once she had left his side. He couldn't put her through this anymore. If she needed him, then he would be there. Never had she ever turned her back on him, even when she had every reason to do so.

As soon as they hit the docks, Fenris leapt from the ship and began his journey to her estate. It was far too late for her to still be up, but he wanted to be there when she awoke. And he knew there would be no sleep for him if he ventured towards his own house. Here lately it was becoming more and more difficult for him to fall asleep without her in his arms. Tonight even more so, knowing that he had missed her touch for so long and she was only a few houses away.

Using his spare key he quietly entered her house. The familiar scent of wood burning fire mixed with lemon filled his nostrils. It was strange the aroma could bring him a feeling of nostalgia. Very few things in his life were capable of bringing him such pleasant feelings.

A he ascended the stairs slowly, he let his hand run the length of her banister. So many memories where in this house. The first time he and Hawke made love, the heartache that came after, the reading lessons that brought them together again, countless nights of cards and laughter. Never before had one place meant so much to him. True he had his own mansion, but he never really thought of it as a home and there were few pleasant memories from that place. The ones he did have revolved around Hawke. His happiness was her.

The door to her chamber was cracked just enough for Fenris to see that her fire was still lit. She must not have gone to bed long ago. Trying to remain quiet he eased her door open and took careful steps into her room.

The sight on her bed made his heart flutter. Hawke lay only in her smallclothes with her thin sheet covering a small part of her midsection. Curled up on her side she gripped his pillow closely to her body and nestled to it. He actually smiled and walked to her desk to begin removing his armor.

Just as his shoulder guards and tunic had come off he heard her shift in the bed. "Fenris, is that you?" Even in her sleepy voice he could hear the excitement.

"I finished my assignment early. I didn't mean to wake you," he answered and continued to undress.

"Nonsense," she responded quickly and rose from her bed. The sheer black robe he'd bought her a few months back hung next to her bed. Without tying it she let it fall loosely against her body and came to him. This had to be his favorite gift that he'd given her. On the rack it had looked beautiful, but nothing could have prepared him for how incredibly sexy she would look in it.

Wiping the sleep from her eyes she walked to him and embraced him tightly around the waist. "I missed you so much. I would have been so cross if you hadn't woken me." With his chest now bare he turned into her hug and cradled her face in his hands.

"I missed you too." Her face lit up at his confession. It was still a feat to get him to admit anything about his feelings even when it came to her. He smiled at her reaction and nuzzled his nose against hers. "I'm not taking any more mercenary work."

Despite the relief he saw on her face she still felt the need to make sure he wasn't doing it just to make her happy. "Fenris…I know how much this means to you. You don't have to stop taking the work just because of me."

"It's not _just_ because of you, Hawke. It's because of us. I don't like being away from you longer than I have to."

"You mean it," she beamed up at him.

He nodded and leaned down to press his lips to hers. Nothing could ever compare to the taste of her kiss. In all his life she was one of the few true joys he had ever found. As their tongues briefly connected Hawke moaned deep in her throat and began pulling him back to the bed with her. Without any hesitation Fenris followed her lead as his pulsed raced with anticipation. Although he had only been gone a few weeks, it felt like an eternity since he last had her.

When their bodies hit the bed, Hawke turned him to sit and stood between his legs as she continued to savor his kiss. Unable to control the fierce desire swelling in him, Fenris ran his hand up the length of her bare legs and squeezed her perfect backside groaning as he felt the firm flesh give in his hands. Without needing an invitation, Hawke straddled his lap and moved her lips to trail kisses down his jaw and neck. His eyes rolled back in his head as her tongue and breath applied just the right amount of sensation to his sensitive spot that rested there.

As his hands ran up her waist and were headed to unleash her breastbinding, Fenris heard the door to her bedroom creak open. Turning his head slowly he saw Hawke's mabari peak his head inside. As soon as he saw Fenris he let out a happy yelp and charged towards the bed.

In his excitement the dog momentarily forgot that he wasn't allowed on her furniture and leapt up, showering Fenris with licks and nudges. Hawke laughed and looked down to her dog. "Looks like someone else missed you, too."

The dog gave a happy bark and rolled over onto his back looking at Fenris expectantly. He sighed and let Hawke leave his lap so he could give the dog some attention. As he scratched his belly the dog started twitching his bottom leg. He leaned down to whisper in the dog's ear, though loud enough that Hawke could still hear. "If you leave us alone for the night, I promise to rub your belly all afternoon tomorrow."

"Careful, Fenris," Hawke smiled. "He'll hold you to that promise."

The dog didn't seemed convinced and got up to rub his head against Fenris's. He got up from the bed and started towards the door, with the mabari following close behind. When they reached the threshold he leaned down to be at eye level with him. "If you guard the door and don't let anyone in, there is a nice big steak in it for you." Immediately the dog darted out of the room and crouched in front of the door. He gave a growl for good measure then looked back to Fenris with an almost happy look before turning back to his post.

Fenris couldn't help but chuckle and shut the door before turning back to Hawke. She was waiting for him in the bed underneath the sheets with a sultry smile. Instantly he felt his groin jerk in response, and when she beckoned him to come to her with her finger he felt the blood rush to his loins. It had been far too long since he last had her and he wanted nothing more than to bury himself between her thighs while she moaned out his name in ecstasy.

As he crawled across the bed and placed his body down on her he realized she had abandoned her last remaining clothing and was waiting for him to claim her. Feeling her hard nipples brush against his chest through the sheet Fenris moaned and propped his elbows up next to her face. "I'm never leaving your side again," he whispered before joining his lips with hers. Hawke moaned at the tenderness of the kiss and raked her hands through his hair and down his back. Once they reached the waist of his pants she slowly began working on freeing him from them.

As he sprang out, Fenris couldn't help but growl deep in his throat when her hand ran up his length. It was always such a strange sensation. Where her hands were soft and smooth, his were hard and calloused. Nothing about his own touch was gentle or caring, never in his fantasies was he ever able to recreate her loving caresses. When she squeezed him and pumped her hand up and down his shaft, Fenris broke their kiss and moaned into her cheek. "Please take me, Fenris. I've missed it so much," her hot breath trickled into his ear.

Somehow he hardened even more and he pushed himself off her to fully remove his breeches. With heavy breaths Hawke pulled the sheet away from her, and offered her body to him. Fenris took a moment to admire the beauty before him. How a woman like her ever found something worthy in him, was beyond him. But he finally learned when the Maker sent you a blessing you didn't ask why it was sent.

With a slow hand he trailed the length of her body, brushing his knuckles against her ribs and breasts until he made it to her chin. Hawke flashed him a radiant smile and he leaned down to kiss her slowly, before propping himself up on one elbow to watch her face as he entered her.

Meeting a little resistance Fenris pushed carefully into her. Even after all this time, her body still had difficulty accommodating his girth. When he felt the tip completely enter, he let out a shaky breath and looked down at her. "Are you okay?" There had been a few times when he was too over eager with her and left her sore for a few days. She nodded and brought her hands to his hips, pushing him to slowly meet hers. Fenris's groan was deep and ragged when he felt her body fully engulf him. Never…he would never grow tired of this.

The heat and slickness of her tight walls were a haven. Her body fit his own with a sweet perfection. Fenris relished the look on her face as he began moving against her. She closed her eyes and panted in time with his slow thrusts. Gripping one of her breast he buried his face into her neck, inhaling her scent as he grunted with pleasure. "I missed you so much," she whispered and wrapped her legs around his waist to deepen him within her.

No words would ever fully convey how much the woman beneath him meant to him. "Cassum sine te, Hawke," he huskily responded in Arcanum still not able to utter his true feelings aloud to her. Although he knew it disappointed her that she never knew what he was actually saying, Hawke smiled and leaned up on her elbows to kiss him. Using just a small out of her tongue she kissed him slowly and began rolling her hips to meet his thrusts.

Knowing that he wouldn't last much longer, Fenris wrapped his arms under her back and rolled over with her, placing her on top of him. Hawke chuckled and leaned down on his chest riding him slow and easy. Fenris matched her pace and gripped her bottom in his hands squeezing every time he pushed himself all the way within her.

He could feel her hand shaking against his cheek and knew that she was close. Trying to give her that extra friction that she needed, Fenris pumped harder, rolling his pelvis against her sensitive spot. Hawke gasped and closed her eyes tight as she began meeting his rhythm. Peaking between their bodies Fenris watched as she took what she needed from him. Seeing himself rock in and out of her made his toes curl. Her breathing became more frantic as she quickened the pace and Fenris had to focus extra hard not finish before she found release.

The grunts and moans echoing through her room began growing louder and louder. Fenris threw his head back and felt his limps tighten. It was too much. The heat and moisture of her body were pushing him over and he was powerless against his own body's need to release himself within her.

Just as he thought he couldn't take it anymore, Hawke moaned his name and pressed her lips against his. Her hands buried themselves within his hair and she gasped against his mouth. Unable to fight the need any longer he gripped her waist firmly and began plummeting relentlessly into her. Hawke pressed her forehead to his and stared into his eyes as they both came in a fierce wave of need and boiling desire.

After he was certain that she was completely satisfied, Fenris slowed his pace and ran his hands up and down the length of her body. She hummed a pleasured moan as she brushed his hair out of his eyes. If she would let him, he would stay like this forever. Wrapped around her body, closing themselves off from the outside world. Kirkwall, the mages, the Templars…they could wait. All he wanted was his Hawke. Keeping her safe and close was all he cared about.

One day they would have the peace they deserved and until then he would give her every part of himself. She would never have to wonder how much he cared for her again. Determined to show her how much he missed this, he cradled her body to his and sat up in the bed. Hawke wrapped her legs completely around his waist and draped her arms across his shoulders. As he pushed her close to him, Fenris claimed her mouth and kissed her slowly, passionately. This woman was his happiness. She placed her delicate fingers against his jaw and rotated her head to deepen the kiss. He felt her lips curl up when he let out a deep growl. Throwing her backwards against the bed he buried his face into her neck and playfully began biting and nipping her flesh. Hawke let out a girlish giggle and threw her head back with a laugh. Unable to hide his smile Fenris propped himself up on his elbow and looked down to her. The love and devotion in her eyes were clear. It was obvious that she had truly missed him and was grateful he was back.

"Will you be staying," she spoke softly and brushed her fingers down his arm. "Or do you need to go home."

"I am home, Hawke," he grinned and nuzzled his nose against her cheek. It was true. Never before had he ever felt like he had a home. Constantly running and dodging slavers. Even when he took Danarius's mansion it had never truly felt like a place he would call home. But with her he felt like all the things missing in his life had been found. His heart belonged to her, and now for the first time in his life he actually felt like he did have a something to call home.

Her.

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><p><strong>Side note: Thought I'd add 'Cassum sine te' roughly means 'nothing without you' in Latin. <strong>


	10. Unwanted Attention

**A/N: This is prompt I filled from the DA kink website. Changed a few of the words, to be less, well kinky. Here is the prompt request:**

_"Friend, if you were any more broody, women would swoon at your feet as you passed, and they'd have broody babies in your honor!"_

Varric's been spinning tales about the romance between the Champion and her broody elf guard, and it's earned Fenris quite the reputation with the ladies. He merely assumes all the girls giggling, whispering, pointing, squealing, and having trouble properly forming a sentence while talking to him is because they're _judging_ him.  
>Hawke sets things straight and shows him exactly why he's so popular.<br>Anon would also love if they're both rather deviously protective of each other against their respective admirers, but won't outwardly admit it

**Warning: Some smut towards the end.**

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><p>Fenris followed behind Hawke as they made their way through the Hightown Market. He hated coming here during this time of day. Too many people. Far too many stares.<p>

Just as they stopped at the weapon's stand a group of girls standing across the courtyard began pointing and staring in his direction. A tall blonde, that was clearly the leader of their little group, gaped at him and leaned into her friends whispering. They erupted in giggles and eyed him. Fenris growled and leaned over to Hawke.

"I do not belong here," he whispered. "There are too many people. People are starting to stare."

Hawke turned towards him and gave him a compassionate gaze. "Just let me finish up with the stall owner." Squeezing his arm she leaned into his ear. "You want to wait at the stairs." Fenris nodded just before Hawke place a chaste kiss to his cheek. "I'll meet you in a bit."

Grateful for her out, Fenris bee lined towards the away glancing back at the group of girls one last time, self-conscious about their obvious mockery of him. Curse these markings. He wasn't even able to venture out in public without someone reminding him that he was some strange freak. Damn, Danarius. Even dead he still affected his life. Glaring at the stone beneath his feet he waited patiently for Hawke to finish with her haggling.

Hawke watched Fenris as the stall owner went to retrieve her new dagger. What could have gotten him so flustered? He had been doing much better since Danarius's death, not as guarded. She gazed around the courtyard to see if she could find the source of his discomfort and then her eyes fell on the group of young women in the corner.

It took her a moment to realize that the source of their continuous giggles and blushing was directed at Fenris. She watched dumbfounded as they raked their eyes up and down his long frame. A wave of fierce jealousy tore through her as she studied the women. All were beautiful, tall, slender. The main culprit was wearing a low cut top that fully showed off her large chest. The long shirt hugged her hips seductively and Hawke could see the confidence in her building. She was about to approach him. Never tearing her eyes off Fenris, the young blond began moving towards him with a fierce determination.

Hawke swallowed loudly and turned back to the stall owner fidgeting nervously for him to return. Just as the girl got about half-way towards Fenris, he came towards her with the new dagger. In haste, she threw some money on the counter and jetted towards him, not even caring that it was more coin than the weapon was worth.

Completely oblivious to the woman approaching him, Fenris continued to stare at the ground only looking up when Hawke suddenly grabbed him and laced her arm through his. "Done," she exclaimed sounding slightly out of breath. "Wanna go practice with it?"

Fenris smiled lightly and nodded as she began leading them towards her mansion, grateful to be away from the prying eyes.

When certain that Fenris wouldn't notice, Hawke glanced over her shoulder at the young woman and narrowed her eyes; telling her exactly who this man belonged to. The snotty girl only smirked and jutted her hip out as she eyed Fenris's backside. It took every ounce of her self-control not to charge at the bimbo and rip that pretty smile straight off her face.

Sucking in her pride she turned forward and brushed her hand against his forearm. She hated this feeling. Every time they went out in public she had to guard him like a…well a hawk. As cheesy as that sounded. Women flocked to him, and she could never tell if Fenris noticed the attention or if he truly was completely oblivious to the adoration as he seemed.

Determined to wash the feeling away she turned towards him with a smile as they entered her home and led him to the back gardens so they could practice with her new dagger. Let the women stare. Only she ever got to see him shirtless. And Maker did he look positively scrumptious underneath the spiky armor. A part of her wanted to forego the practice all together and let him ravish her for the remainder of the day.

She sighed as they entered the small courtyard. No, there was too much to be done today. The ravishing would have to wait.

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><p>Fenris walked back to his manor just before dusk eager to get a bath and change clothes before meeting Hawke and the rest of their companions at The Hanged Man. She certainly made him break a sweat this afternoon.<p>

He smiled to himself, she seemed to do that a lot. Practicing or by _other_means. With his head down lost in his visions of Hawke he continued on his walk.

So distracted, he rounded the corner to Hightown Estates and was brought to a halt as he crashed into a woman walking down the steps.

On reaction he brought his hands out to steady her. "Excuse me," he muttered. The woman looked back at him with large eyes as she took in his form. Her eyes scanned his body and he saw her mouth trying to make words as she studied him. Growing frustrated yet again with the unwanted judgment he side stepped her and began walking back up the stairs.

"Th-thank you," she stuttered out as he passed, causing him to pause.

When he turned back to her the look of terror in her eyes was clear. He felt bad for a moment. He had no intention to harm her, but merely by his looks the woman was scared of him. With a sigh he waved his hand at her and continued to his mansion.

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><p>As the strange looking elf made his way up the stairs the woman stared at him in awe. What a magnificent specimen of man. She had heard rumors of the Champion's elven lover who lived in Hightown, but Maker if this was him, the stories could never do him justice. Those beautiful green eyes and tan skin, offset perfectly by his white hair and mystical tattoos. It was no wonder she was seeing him. Surely, there wasn't a more beautiful man in the whole of Kirkwall. She took a moment to gather her bearings before she made her way back towards her own home.<p>

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><p>After his bath was finished, Fenris dressed and looked out his window. The sun had set a few hours ago and Hawke was already no doubt at the bar with her friends. Propping his arm up against the wall, he contemplated whether or not he should go. This day had been draining.<p>

It was beginning to be tiresome. No matter how hard he tried to keep to himself, people couldn't seem to leave him be. Now that he was with Hawke it had become worse. Especially, with Varric spinning wild tales about two of them. People were beginning to get even more curious about her strange companion than they were before.

He had always been a man who valued his privacy. Going into the relationship with Hawke he knew that he would have to let some of that go. But that didn't mean it wasn't difficult. People thought bad enough of him when he was alone. Now he was certain that every time his back was turned there were whispers about how he wasn't good enough for their Champion or shock that she would allow herself to be lowered to him.

Fenris sighed in frustration. If he didn't show, it would surely disappoint Hawke. Perhaps he could wait for her to return to her mansion and explain when she returned.

No. He wasn't that weak. He shouldn't let the stares and talk get to him. If she didn't care than neither should he. There was much more for her to lose by being with him than the other way around.

Picking up his sword, he strapped it to his back and made his way to the bar to meet them. Perhaps a drink would make him feel better.

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><p>As Fenris entered the Hanged Man he tried extra hard not to breathe in the awful stench of the place. If Varric and Hawke didn't love this place so much, he would never step foot in this wretched hole again. Taking a moment to calm and prepare for the unwanted attention that was to come, he felt his muscles flex then scanned the crowd for Hawke taking extra care not to make eye contact with any of the other patrons.<p>

As soon as he saw her profile at the far end of the bar Fenris smirked and began moving towards her. When he neared he noticed an unfamiliar man speaking with her. Curiosity getting the better of him and he paused to studied the two of them for a moment.

The dark haired man looked incredibly strong and even Fenris knew that he would be considered attractive. Something about the way the man was staring at her put him off. His eyes lingered a little too long on her mouth as he listened to her speak. He leaned just a little too close when he responded.

An intense heat began building in his stomach. Who in the void did this man think he was? And even though Hawke wasn't egging him on, why was she being so nice to him?

He fought extra hard to keep the jealousy down. She was the Champion. People from all walks of life admired and wanted to speak with her. Deciding to let it go, Fenris started to join their friends at their table.

But just as he moved to walk away the stranger reached over and placed his hand against her forearm as he spoke. His insides jerked and without even thinking his body darted to her side. To let her know that he was standing behind her, Fenris ran his fingers across the small of her back and leaned in to place a kiss right below her ear.

Hawke jerked in surprise then smiled widely when she realized it was him. "Fenris," the excitement was clear on her voice. "I wasn't sure you were going to come."

"I wouldn't miss it," he grinned and lightly kissed her on the lips, shifting his eyes towards the unknown man briefly as he did so.

Obviously pleased by his presence Hawke wrapped her arms around his waist and beamed as she looked up at him. The man next to them cleared his throat. "Oh, I'm sorry. Fenris this is James. He was one of the mercenaries I worked with when I first arrived in Kirkwall."

"Yes, we go way back," he smiled and reached out to shake his hand.

Fighting back a growl in his throat at the look on _James's_face, he tightened his arms around Hawke's waist and leaned against her forehead. "Nice to meet you," he forced out purposefully not reaching out for his hand.

He felt Hawke's hands rub against his back as she leaned back and smiled at him before turning to her friend. "It was good to see you, James. Take care."

Before he had a chance to respond, Fenris gripped her to him and led them over to their friends, eager to be away from the man.

"Elf!" Varric gestured wildly with his hands as they approached. "Decided to make an appearance after all."

"Wouldn't want to disappoint you," he responded dryly and let Hawke take the last seat on the bench. Scooting closer to Merrill, she made a small spot for him and patted it with her hand. Favoring the small space over standing, Fenris took the seat and let her drape one of her legs over his own to make more room.

While the group talked and conversed throughout the night, Fenris wrapped one of his arms around Hawke and rested his other hand on her knee when he wasn't taking swigs on his ale. Despite, the alcohol his uncomfortableness wasn't wavering.

Periodically he would catch an unknown person eyeing him, only to lean in and whisper something to one of their companions as he caught them. It never failed. No matter where he went people seemed to gossip about him.

Trying to focus on Hawke's laugh and the presence of her hand over his own he forced himself to turn back to the group. But in the back of his mind he was still keenly aware of the eyes on him.

He felt her fingers tighten around his own and looked towards her. "Is everything alright, Fenris?"

"Yes," he answered knowing that she would be able to see that it wasn't. "I just…just need another ale." He squeezed her fingers and left to go to the bar.

Although he didn't really need another drink, he wasn't about to go back on his comment and admit his ill feelings. So he waited for Corff to see bring him another drink, hoping that he would go unnoticed.

But that hope proved to be futile. Not a moment after Corff walked away a young woman slid up next to him.

Fenris ground his teeth but didn't look at her.

"So you are here with the Champion," she cooed in an airy voice. "Are you the one everyone speaks of?"

"Perhaps," was his short answer but he still would not look in her direction.

"So what exactly do you do with markings? I've heard some strange things." Fenris cut his eyes to her and noticed the sinister smile playing on her lips. No doubt she was mocking him. He didn't respond and looked back forward. "You don't talk much do you?" When he still didn't answer she continued. "You know a man like you…"

Fenris knew where this was going '_shouldn't be with Hawke_.' He cut her off with a sharp wave of his hand the left the bar abandoning his drink order.

He stomped back over to Hawke who rose from her seat the moment she saw him approaching. "I'm ready to go home," she announced to the group. "Walk me," she turned to him and offered and small smile.

Grateful that she saw his frustration he nodded and didn't wait for her as he exited the bar. It didn't take long for her to meet him outside and she motioned for him to come with her. Trying to get his emotions in check he laced their fingers together as they walked, and focused on her sweet scent and breathing. When they were alone everything seemed so easy. But as soon as other people became involved his insecurities clouded everything.

He wasn't even aware they hadn't spoken a word until she stopped him at her door. "Will you come in?" She gazed at him hopefully. Truthfully he wanted nothing more, but something was holding him back. She noticed his indecision and stepped closer to him, bringing her hand to his cheek. "I want you to."

Sighing he kissed her palm and followed her into her estate and up the stairs to her bedroom. Once inside Hawke immediately began changing out of her armor. "Why did you want to leave The Hanged Man tonight?" He wanted to know if she truly knew how incredibly self-deprecating he felt at the moment.

"Because I was tired," she answered from her wardrobe as she pulled down her pants and stood only in her small clothes. "_And_I know you wanted to leave." He sighed in defeat and leaned on the mantle of her fireplace, she had noticed. Out of the corner of his eye he saw her approaching him with her light robe on. "What's troubling you, Fenris?"

He should tell her. Just be honest. Perhaps it would feel good to talk about his concerns. "It is just difficult," he began slowly. "I thought with Danarius dead things would become easier. That I would be free from the chains of slavery. But I feel like everyone stills sees me as one. These markings…they all stare at me like I'm some kind of beast."

Hawke was taken back. Not in years had anyone truly looked at Fenris as such. He had made quite a name for himself across Kirkwall. Not only was he respected, but admired. And she knew for a fact most of the women in the city would love nothing more than a night with him. "Who looks at you like that?" She furrowed her brow, feeling a wave of protection rush across her.

"Everyone," he answered with a little more aggression than he intended. "All those people at the bar, those girls in the market, that woman on the stairs."

He heard Hawke chuckle from behind him as she raked her arms around his chest and propped her head against his shoulder. "You truly don't know how amazing you are do you?"

Fenris sighed and grasped one of her hands against his chest, bringing it to his lips. It was a good thing that she saw him in the light, but he doubted anyone else did. "You do not see how they stare at me, Hawke. I assure you '_amazing'_ is not the word they are using to describe me."

Bringing her hand to his cheek she slowly turned his face towards her. "I see how they stare and trust me they are." Not believing her he started to pull away, only to have her tighten her hold on him and turn him to face her. "Do you know why they stare, Fenris." When he didn't respond and looked away from her she leaned up and kissed him slowly, bringing his attention back to her.

Just when he thought his knees might give at the intensity of the kiss she broke away and looked into his eyes. "You are by far the sexiest man in Kirkwall," she smiled. "It's a wonder you can leave your house without women barricading you in the doorway."

Placing a hand to her waist he grinned he and used his free hand to encircle her wrist that rested against his shoulder. Knowing that she thought of him that way did make him feel better. "I think your opinion may be a little one-sided, Hawke," he smiled.

"Perhaps," she grinned and began removing his armor while she distracted him with her words. "But I also know that I am constantly having to intimidate women from approaching you. You have no idea how many evil stares I get just because you are at my side." Once his chest was bare she began leading him towards the bed. Fenris smiled in appreciation and fell back against the mattress as she climbed up across him. "You have the most beautiful hair," she breathed and ran her fingers through his strands, massaging his scalp. He moaned his approval and brought his hands to her hips. "Every woman would love nothing more than to have you under them. Or on top of them. _Or_behind them," she winked and nibbled his ear lobe, eliciting another moan from him.

"Believe me," she whispered against his ear. Her hot breath making him shiver. "If anyone thinks of you as a beast, I know exactly what they are referring to." She ran her hand down his bare chest and gripped his length over his pants. Fenris hissed at the contact and arched his back. "You are gorgeous." She began trailing kisses down his jaw and continued down to his chest, stopping when she reached his nipple. "Incredibly hot," she sighed as she stared at his bare torso then began moving lower again. Every kiss she placed to his abdomen caused a warm tingle to rush to his groin. Her destination was clear and Fenris found his muscles tensing in anticipation. When she reached his pelvis she ran her tongue along the length of his waistband, stopping to place kisses periodically. "I am the luckiest woman in Thedas," she smiled and began working on freeing him from his pants. By the look on her face, Fenris could tell she honestly believed those words.

When she finally had him in her hands the look of pure lust on her face caused him to shudder. She placed an open mouthed kiss against his tip and moaned in pleasure before taking it fully into her mouth. Fenris groaned and brought one arm behind his head so he could prop himself up to watch her. Flattening her tongue she ran it up the length of him before taking as much as she could muster into her mouth. The warm heat and moisture caused him to let out a gasp of pleasure, but he never took his eyes off her. She rolled her eyes back in her head as she began pumping her hand up and down his shaft, bobbing her head in time to her strokes. Fenris was in awe. The look of pure pleasure on her face made him want to spill himself right there. It was like the taste of him was the best thing she had ever had. Her tongue danced and twirled on the sensitive spot just at the base of his head, Fenris jerked and breathed her name, begging her to stop. He wasn't sure he would last at her pace. Hawke teased him with a hard suck then released him from her mouth. "I will never grow tired of doing this Fenris," she smiled and gave him a playful lick.

"Hmmm…I hope you never do," he grinned and reached for her come to him. Leaning over his body she brought her lips to his and kissed him with a heated passion as he tucked his hands under the waistband of her smallclothes and began shimming then down her hips. Once past her behind Hawke worked her legs to bring them all the way off, while Fenris raised his hips to pull his pants down. As their bodies touched Hawke sat up and shifted her hips so he was at her opening. Bringing her hand down to him, she gave him a few pumps before dragging his tip against her. Fenris gripped her hips and gave a gentle thrust. Hawke smiled seductively as she slid herself all the way down him, gasping as he was fully sheathed within her. Feeling her slick tight walls encompass him made Fenris let out a feral groan. The bliss of being inside her would never grow tiresome. Having her body take him in was the greatest joy he knew in the world.

He watched her as she abandoned her robe and reached behind her to unlatch her breastbinding. Upon seeing her chest, Fenris growled and ran his hand up her abdomen to feel her in his hands. Gripping her forcefully Hawke threw her head back as she began using her strong legs to propel herself up and down on him.

Fenris watched the joining of their bodies. With every pump from her he raised his hips to meet, giving a hard thrust against her each time he was fully engulfed inside. "Oh, Fenris," she moaned. "I love this." Wanting to kiss her, Fenris sat up pulling her close to him as he rolled his pelvis into her sensitive spot. Hawke gasped as he buried his hands in her hair and assaulted her neck with kisses and nips. Feeling her breast brush against his chest made him weak. Letting her take control for a moment, she rocked her body against him as kissed his way down to her breast, taking her nipple into his mouth. She cradled his head to her as she propped one hand on his leg and rolled into him. When she whimpered and breathed his name, Fenris knew she was near. Tightening her legs around him, she brought her hands to his shoulders and began pumping herself feverously against him.

Giving her the extra friction she needed, he gripped her behind and pushed with her thrust, letting her use him to reach the height of her pleasure. He felt her muscles twitch just before she buried her head onto his shoulder, using it to muffle her cries of ecstasy.

When he felt her grip on him loosen, he flipped her over in one swoop, never leaving her body. Not letting her have a reprieve from her orgasm, he gripped her hip and shoulder and began thrusting relentlessly into her. Her walls tighter from the effects of her climax, he felt the tension building in him. Each moan and gasp from her mouth was sending him further and further towards the edge. When she wailed her approval, he felt the rush to his groin.

As if sensing that what was about to happen, Hawke arched her back and pumped against him, meeting his pace. When he came, it rushed out of him in a fierce wave of tingles and hot deep pressure. The intensity was too much and he growled pressing his forehead against her shoulder. After giving a few last thrust to ensure he was completely spent he collapsed against her too weak to move.

The pounding of her pulse and labored breathing rang in his ears. As he struggled to decrease his own, he felt her hands run up and down the length of his back before she cradled him to her and nuzzled against his neck. "You are amazing, Fenris. Never let anyone make you feel otherwise."

She was incredible. Without her, he would still surely be lost. She took the time to know him for what he truly was, not what the world perceived him as. In her eyes he was the greatest man in Thedas, and he would spend every day for the rest of their lives proving to her that he was worthy of her praise.

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><p><strong>AN: I hope you like this one. For now it will be the last one that I post for this group. I have some other ideas but I'll probably be putting them up later on their o****wn. T.I.M. thank you for reading and reviewing every chapter. And Kristenkrios thanks for being such an amazing, encouraging friend. **


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